You Only Live Twice
by AceyMarshmallow
Summary: "All of a sudden, getting reincarnated as a toilet brush doesn't seem so bad." I sometimes wonder what on earth I did to piss the universe off so much. Because apparently getting me killed in the most unoriginal way wasn't quite enough… Semi-SI/OC.
1. Prologue

**A/N: Hello everyone! This will be my very first Shingeki no Kyojin story (wooo!). This has got to me one of my all-time favorite anime/manga. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin/Attack on Titan, it belongs to Isayama Hajime, though all original content and character(s) are mine. Any other products (etc.) that may occur does not belong to me either. This disclaimer applies to all chapters that are posted, as I'm too lazy to put a disclaimer on every single chapter.**

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><p><strong>Prologue <strong>

_[__I want to die like my grandfather, _

_peacefully in his sleep, _

_not screaming and terrified like his passengers.__]_

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><p>The car had come out of nowhere.<p>

I hadn't registered the approach of it before I suddenly found myself flipping over the windshield with such brute force that the pain wasn't even registered. I could practically hear the sickening sound of the glass breaking as it connected with my flailing body. I was in too much shock to feel any sort of pain from the impact.

And then, all of a sudden, I was airborne, my body being hurled through the air faster than my own brain could register. I knew pain was inevitable.

It hadn't been until I had heard the thud of my head connecting with the ground, felt the snapping of my own bones, and the cutting of small pieces of rock and glass piercing my skin – that realization truly hit me.

_A car had hit me._

I had felt my eyes roll back, and take in how the streetlights, shock-struck people, and pavement was all oddly disfigured and dotted with black – my entire world having turned upside down.

The driver behind the wheel had obviously been driving at a pace way over the legal speed limit, or else I would have seen it coming – and he most likely would have been able to stop. Looking back, I can easily come up with a few creative words and cusses I would have been happy to throw in the moron's face. With my lack of luck, the wazoo behind the wheel might have even been drunk.

Then, an explosion of pain had hit me. Never in my entire life have I ever experienced such intense agony, crushing every nerve in my body. It was torture. My most likely broken bones were screaming, my head was splitting and my skin was on fire.

The timing of the whole scenario was a bit ridiculous, really. I'd even go as far as to call it a bit ironic.

It hadn't been more than five minutes ago that I had had a ridiculously loud argument with Mrs. Whitt – the Headmistress of the orphanage I have lived in for as long as my memory allows to take me back. I had practically been sitting on my knees, begging her to make an exception and let me leave the institution. You usually have to wait until you're eighteen, an adult of legal age, before you are let out of the claws of that place. But there are still seven months until my eighteenth birthday, and though the house itself wasn't exactly driving me insane – the company of wailing children certainly were.

I had told Mrs. Whitt that I am perfectly capable of taking responsibility for myself, and watching out for any nearby dangers that should lurk in the shadows. I was old enough to take care of myself.

Obviously the answer had been 'no', and being the mature person I surely am (note sarcastic voice), I had yelled a few unladylike words at her (mainly spitting insults at her big ugly mole on her forehead) and had proceeded to run out of the front door. As I had literally made it to cross the street (the streetlight turning green, mind you), my feet running faster than the time I had to outrun Mr. Aiden's dog, fate decided to interfere, and – you guessed it – sent a car my way.

Fate is very cruel if you ask me. And I believe fate has a sadistically mean way of humoring itself. If I weren't the one hit by the car, I probably would have laughed at the whole situation. I mean, who goes "I can watch out for myself!" proceeds to cross the closest road, and BAM! Gets proven wrong by the first car that comes this way. Gotta love the invention of irony.

I remember that in that moment, a small part of me was hoping that the blow would kill me; I wanted to die. I wanted to escape from the indescribable torture in which I found myself in. That's another thing fate decided to mock me with.

The blow _did_ kill me.

People always say you have to watch out for what you wish for. Even if it was just for a split second the thought crossed my mind, it was apparently enough for my wish to be granted.

My senses lost touch with the world before the sound of sirens had even reached my ears. And so, death had been met.

Little did I know that whoever came up with the phrase 'You Only Live Once' deserves a swift kick in the arse.

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><p><strong>AN: So, I have this sinking feeling that this whole reincarnation-concept-thingy is overused by now. But as this is a story that has been in progress for **_**months**_**, I decided it would be a waste not to post it. Not to mention, I have been wanting to write a story for this anime ever since I watched it for the first time, and, of course, the plot-bunny keeps popping up with new ideas for this fic. Also, what's more epic in a story than having the main character die in the first chapter? So here it is! Feedback is very much appreciated :)**


	2. The Wake Up

**A/N: Thank you so much TheGirlWithTheParticleCollider, Pani Keczup and silvermacabre for being the first reviewers! **

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><p>Vivid images from the crash filled my head, in an odd twisting spiral of confusion. My eyebrows furrowed together and I instantly shot my eyes open in horror, only to have them blinded by piercing sunlight. <em>What in the actual hell? Didn't that blow kill me?<em> Blinking my eyes for a bit, a few seconds passed by before they managed to adjust and focus to the sudden bright light. _Did I somehow survive and end up in the hospital? In that case, you are welcome to refer to me as 'Tara, the girl who lived'._ At the moment, everything in my head seemed foggy; it felt like I was just mentally and physically permanent shut down, only to be jolted back to life. My level of awareness was currently below zero.

I slowly began to heave myself up from the hard uncomfortable ground I was placed on, noticing how oddly groggy and bendy my limbs felt. The movement of my own limbs somehow didn't feel right; it didn't feel like it was my body. As ridiculous as that sounds.

I let my eyes dance back and forth, only to conclude that I was nowhere near a hospital. _What's going on?_ Forehead crinkling in confusion, I got up from the ground, panic starting to bubble up inside of me.

_Where am I?_

Anyone out there know the feeling of waking up in some random place you just don't know where is? You know, somewhere you're most likely not supposed to be? I guess people that have tried getting kidnapped know where I'm coming from. And people that have gotten too drunk at a party. Well… anyone out there who can actually give a girl in need some _advice_?

_All right girl, focus._

I was standing in the middle of a deserted alleyway, old houses towering over me on either side. The buzzing and murmuring of people doing their everyday activity wasn't far away, but for some reason, I couldn't hear any trace of screeching car tires or angry demands that people get out of the way. It all seemed too quiet, peaceful even.

Loud missing traffic noises aside – why was everything so large? It seemed like everything just grew a few sizes while I was out. And why was I not in the hospital? How was I even alive? I'm pretty sure a blow like that would kill you. Actually, I'm pretty sure I _did_ die… it felt that way at least. Then again, it _was_ my first time dying, so how would I truly know? I'm no expert.

Groaning in exasperation, I ran a hand through my hair in frustration, taking a few steps forward. _There are just too many questions._ I quickly stopped again, retracting my hand from my hair and wrinkling my eyebrows together in puzzlement. Why did my hair feel so greasy and knotted and… dirty? And why did my body feel so freaking weird?!

Out of instinct, I turned my palm up to look at my hand, immediately feeling all of the blood leave my face.

_This is not my hand. _

Scratch the fact that the hand in front of my eyes was currently covered in scratches and smothered by dirt. It's the fact that the hand was so _small_, that I felt my mouth fall open in shock. _This is not my hand._ I repeated to myself, turning and twisting the hand around. _And yet it is._

A sickening feeling in my stomach started to appear, as if I was going to be sick, as a new thought suddenly hit me. _If my hand looks like this, then…?_

I didn't get to finish my own sentence. Instead, I ran across the dirty pavement and toward the closest house, heading right for the large window. The blood in my veins was pumping loudly as my feet screeched to a halt in front of the glass, my heart racing against my chest. Clenching my shaking fists, I took a deep breath and let my eyes flicker up from the ground to face the reflection of the window.

My breath got caught in my throat.

My stomach turned icy.

My mouth turned dry.

And the world stopped functioning.

All because the girl mirrored in _my_ reflection, was not me. She couldn't even be called a girl; it was a mere child. She looked to be no more than seven, maybe eight years of age.

The child's large, round, and dilating eyes were an oddly green color, filled with flecks of amber around the small, black iris. Her rounded face looked awfully pale compared to the multiple dark spots of dirt smeared across her face, as if she had been sleeping with her head into the ground for weeks. The filth on her face was nothing compared to the filth in her hair though. It was difficult to even make out what color her hair was. The smothered wavy locks of hair were standing out in every possible direction – it looked like the girl hadn't taken care of it for years. At first glance, her hair simply looked dark, but with further inspection, a few of the locks actually looked _light._ If not for the multiple layers of dirt, I think the girl would have what people refer to as "beachy brown" hair. It would be obvious to anyone that her hair would have been pretty if cared and tended for.

_That isn't me._

In a last attempt to convince myself, I raised my left hand and placed it gently across my cheek, only to realize with horror, that the girl in my reflection mirrored the action. _No. Way._

I shook my head. The child in the window shook her head. I jumped. The child in the window jumped.

_This isn't possible._

That person couldn't possibly be me. She didn't even look remotely like me! Where was my long, dark and _straight_ hair? Where were my brown eyes? Where was my naturally tanned skin? Where was my too thin face? And where in the _hell_ was my seventeen year old body?!

_I refuse to believe this. It isn't possible._

Anyone know the feeling of waking up in some random kid's body? I highly doubt it…

I continued to come up with one bad excuse after another, giving myself reasons why a scenario like this just doesn't happen.

I was never much of a scientific person, but then again, I was never much of a believer in the supernatural either. But this time I would have to ram my foot in the ground and yell, "screw you, this isn't real!" to whoever was trying to troll me.

Maybe I _was_ kidnapped and brought to some foreign place?

_Great excuse, Sherlock, then how do you explain the fact that you're currently controlling some poor kid's body?_

Oh…right.

"I am so confused." I murmured, but ended up jumping in surprise at the small and childish voice that echoed through the alley. Placing a hand over my – or this child's – racing heart, I took a deep breath in an attempt to calm myself.

"Okay, let's see…" I mumbled to myself, thrusting a small hand out in front of my face and pointed an opposite finger to the thumb, "I _know_ I was hit by a car," I counted the mentioned event with my finger, and then continued, "I _think_ I might have died," _and here comes all of the creative words I would have loved to throw in the driver's face,_ "I for some reason woke up again, but in a strange place in some child's body."

Scratching the back of my ear in frustration, I let the whole scenario run through my head multiple times, my mind desperately trying to come up with a solution. And that solution is a thing I never truly believed in…

"Reincarnation…?" I tapped my chin in thought, feeling my eyebrows furrow together in disbelief.

_Is such a thing even possible?_

I never really gave such a thing as reincarnation much thought, much less what happens after you die. I never really thought it necessary, as I was still young and shouldn't think about what happens after death, because… well… I always thought I would die of aging. You know, death would come when I was, like, ninety…

Guess I was wrong.

I never believed in such a thing as reincarnation. I do however believe that if you're really a mean person, you're gonna come back as a fly and eat poop. So obviously I must have done something right. I'm not really sure what I did to deserve a second life as a human child. As far as I remembered, I was never one to walk around with a large shiny halo above my head. Admittedly, I was probably quite a bad person. Of course, there was that one time where I crawled up in a tree to get back some kid's balloon… but I then proceeded to demand money for the act. Yup, I probably never made it to Santa's list over good kids.

Still, the Universe and fate must _really_ love me if they decided to let me live as a human again. One thing is for sure; I was definitely not going to spoil the opportunity.

Letting the corners of my lips tug up and into a huge grin, I huffed in satisfaction, turned around, and started to walk down the deserted alley. Now that I had been reincarnated (if you can even call it that) I could at least figure out where on this earth I was. But was this even reincarnation? As far as I know, when reincarnated, you would start from scratch as a wailing baby. So then, what was this called? Had my soul just, like, possessed some random kid not to go to "the other side"?

… _Meh, I'm gonna go with reincarnation at the moment._

A few minutes passed by with me tripping down multiple alleys, until I finally made it to a larger, and much more civilized, street. I didn't really give the fact that this child – aka my new body – was wearing some pretty old-schooled clothes, much thought. And when I say old school, I mean _old school_, as in Stone Age clothes.

But now that I had finally made it to a much more humanized area, I realized that I'm not the only one dressed in what could pass as a sloppy costume. _Everyone_ was. Men and women alike. It looked as if all of the townsfolk were trying to cosplay.

But I quickly came to realize that it was nothing compared to the town itself.

Eyes wide with confusion and flickering back and forth, I slowly began to take small weary steps through the town.

There were no cars. Or bikes. Or streetlights. Or pavements. Why did the boutiques and grocery shops look so weird and old-fashioned? Why did it seem like everything was just one huge market? I swear, it seemed like everything here was taken right out of the Middle Ages. The buildings pretty much had the same color and design; they were all build of limestone, and they all had quoins, dormer windows, and steep hipped roofs.

_Have I gone back in time?_

With the way everything looked like, it seemed legit. But come on; 'reincarnation' _and _'back in time'? Somebody draw a line here!

It felt like my head was about to crack open from all of the questions bubbling up. For some reason though, I continued to walk. A part of me was hoping, _believing_, that once I made it out of this town, everything would go back to normal. Cars, traffic, 21st century buildings, and technology would all return once I made it out of this crazy place.

Unfortunately, instead of freedom, I was met with a large wall.

My body instantly froze in place, my feet coming to a stop on the ground. My face went slack, and my muscles all tensed up to the point where moving them would have been painful. I could do nothing else but stare with wide eyes at the tall wall, while my stomach knotted itself together in worry.

The thought of not being able to get out made me feel trapped, like a wild animal in a cage. The wall that looked to be around fifty meters tall made me feel uncomfortably small. The way everything here suddenly seemed so familiar made me want to throw up.

A few minutes passed by as I simply stared dumbstruck up at the wall, before my eyes flickered to a small group of middle-aged men, all sitting huddled around an old barrel and playing cards. It was not the men I ended up staring at in absolute horror. It was the uniforms they were all wearing. The uniforms consisting of brown jackets, white pants and knee-length leather boots. It was the silver gear they were all wearing that made me stare even longer.

I shook my head and began to take a few unsteady steps back, my thoughts occupied denying what my eyes were seeing.

I ended up walking toward an elder couple that seemed to be talking to each other. Upon further inspection, I realized that they were both talking to each other in some odd language that was most definitely not English. It sounded like a mix between German, a bit of French, and a third language I couldn't tell what was. But for some reason, I could understand it. Or maybe it was not even me that could understand it; maybe it was this body?

_What's going on?_

The pair split up; the elder man walked off while the elder woman stayed to look at some flowers. I decided to take this as my opportunity to run over to the woman.

_None of this is possible._

"Excuse me…?" I asked gently, startled to find my English gone and replaced with the weird language they have here.

_I'm so confused._

"Yes?" The elder woman looked up from her flower inspecting, sending a soft smile my way.

I decided I might as well come clear at once, and so, I turned a small hand out to point at the large wall looming above us. "Um, what's that wall for?"

_Stuff like this doesn't happen._

"Why that's Wall Maria, dear." The old lady gave me an almost sympathetic smile. I couldn't help but feel surprised that she wasn't repulsed by the filthy way I surely looked. "It keeps us all safe from the terrible monsters in the world outside the walls."

_Monsters…_

"Monsters?" I repeated, desperately trying to hide my now shaking fists.

"The Titans, dear." Another sympathetic smile my way.

_Titans…_

It felt like someone just poured ice-cold water down my back. I'm pretty sure my heart just skipped a beat. My brain had forgotten how to pull in fresh air. And my entire body had gone numb. It's as if my mind had gone into total overdrive, and so, I'm surprised that I was still capable of speaking.

"What year are we in?"

"Year 842, dear."

I barely got to murmur a low "thank you", before I felt my feet move from under me. Suddenly, I found myself sprinting through the Renaissance-styled town, desperately hoping that I could somehow run away from all of this. Desperately hoping that I could somehow run away from all of the livid memories currently clouding my mind.

I could have been anything. I could have been _anywhere_. But out of all the places, out of all possibilities, I ended up in the one place you just don't want to live in. Whether you're a normal and functional human being, or an otaku like me, this is a place surely no one would like to live in out of his or her free will. Because in this world, people die. And I mean more than usual. People get squashed like bugs, or get eaten faster than a pig. One thing was for sure;

I did not want to live in the Shingeki No Kyojin world.

_I was wrong…_

The Universe and fate must _really_ hate me.

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><p>So after having about five thousand heart attacks, ten thousand panic attacks, and having run about a billion miles, I finally managed to drain this teeny tiny body from energy. I'm not kidding when I say I fell flat and face first on the ground, in the middle of the road. I practically had to drag myself to the side and onto a patch of grass not to get tramped down by a guy on his horse (yes, we have now gone back to riding horses). And now, I was sitting with my head between my legs in a poor attempt to get my breathing back, and to try and get my not-so-brilliant brain running with ideas.<p>

So far my timeline pretty much went like this:

I was hit by a car.

I died.

I was reincarnated into a child's body.

That child, as far as I knew, had no parents and was probably homeless, which also meant, I didn't have a place to stay at the moment.

The year now was 842, which meant there were three years until everything basically went to hell.

And lastly, my new life was apparently in a show I once deemed as fiction, where humanity is close to extinction, because of the Titans that are now at the top of the food chain and eats us humans.

…

I'd like to become a fly that eats poop now, thank you.

"Shit…" I whispered, hiding my face in my trembling hands. Let's just say I was nowhere near being happy with Fate, the Universe, or whatever the hell up there decided to put me here. What did I do to deserve this in the first place? Was this karma or something? Did I accidently kill a puppy or something? Or maybe I ran over a kitten at some point?

"Are you alright?"

I whipped my head around at the speed of that of an eagle, my eyes wide and probably visible with all of the panic and frustration I was currently feeling. No doubt I must had looked like a frightened deer, with the way I was scrunched over, wide-eyed and hands shaking from nervousness.

The woman that addressed said question was standing a few feet behind me, having left the busy road and entered the long sidewalk of grass. Her blonde hair had been put up in a loose bun, and her eyes had the same color of the sky above us. Her eyes and face had that natural vibe of happiness and pleasant friendliness that is so rare to find in people. Though she all in all still looked young, a few traces of wrinkles had started to appear around her eyes.

I completely forgot to answer her question, as I was instead too occupied observing this pleasant-looking lady.

After about a minute in utter silence, the blonde woman decided to take a few careful steps closer to my huddled form, seeming careful not to scare me away.

As I made no movement to indicate that I might run off, the woman finally put her bag of groceries on the ground, and then proceeded to squad down in front of me. I shifted a little in my seat not to twist my back too much.

"What's your name?" The woman tried again, sending a soft smile my way.

"Tara Yandell." I blurted out, but ended up wincing once the words had left my mouth. I mentally facepalmed at my own stupidity. _Way to go._ Because the name 'Tara Yandell' was totally something people would name their children here. How dense can one possibly get? The first- and surnames people had here were mainly German and French. Also, this would totally be my chance at coming up with some new and cool name.

_Dammit, Tara!_

"Tara…" The blonde woman mimicked, her smile widening even more. "What an unusually pretty name."

"Thank you…" I murmured, running the back of my hand across my nose in an attempt to itch it.

"Well, are you lost, Tara?"

_I guess you can say that. _

"Sort of." I answered her a bit uncertain. The blonde woman simply threw a sympathetic smile my way.

"Do you need some help finding your parents?"

"I don't have any parents." I blurted out again, this time though, it took me a while to realize that it probably wasn't a good thing to say either. In the end, I'm not even sure whether this kid I was currently stuck in, had parents or not. I mean, she could have – I just sort of doubted it by the way she looked. 'I don't have any parents' had just sort of become one of those bad habits you get over time. It was something I was used to saying a lot, as stuff where your parents are involved often comes up on a daily basis. I'd even go as far as to say that it corresponds to people stating they're hungry.

"I see…" The woman mumbled under her breath, seeming to be thinking something over.

A short silence followed before the blonde woman, out of nowhere, took a gentle hold of my hand, making me start in surprise. Now kids, if some random adult you don't know ever grabs your hand out of nowhere, it means you should race Bugs Bunny in the opposite direction.

"My name is Ada," the blonde woman stated softly, giving me a bright smile, "I was just on my way home to make dinner for my family. You look hungry, do you want to come, Tara?"

Another thing to remember, kids, is to never follow some stranger who says they will feed you.

I believe a smart person in this kind of situation would have screamed, "kidnapping!" and then run in the other direction. Was I a smart person? Not really. Was I currently giving into the hunger itching my stomach instead of listening to the tiny rational part of my mind that was screaming "no"? …Probably.

After another minute in silence, I ended up nodding my head up and down, a small smile making it to my lips. The woman, Ada, now smiling brighter than a child on Christmas Eve, pulled me up by the hand. One arm occupied carrying a large bag of groceries, and another occupied holding my hand, Ada slowly started to lead me through the town. I made sure to pay attention as to where she was leading me, just in case she truly was a serial killer and I would have to make a run for it later. One can never be too sure in these situations.

"So, how old are you, Tara?" Ada suddenly asked, obviously trying to make small talk. I lingered at the question a minute too long. How old should I say I was? If I said seventeen, she would most likely laugh at me.

"…Eight." I finally said, deciding it was the oldest I could go for.

I would rather not stay a kid too long.

"How wonderful! That means you are only a year older than my son." Ada said, making me smile.

Great! If Ada had a son, it minimized the chance of her being a psycho killer. Unless, of course, the son was an absolute lunatic too.

_If that's the case, then get ready to make a run for it the moment you step inside the house. _

It didn't particularly take that long before I found myself placed in front of, what I was going to assume, was Ada's house. Just like any other house in this town, it was a bit on the small side and renaissance-styled. During our little field trip Ada had been blabbering on about this and that. I had only paid half-attention, too occupied coming up with escape routes in my mind.

The inside of the house looked the same as what one would expect to see in the Shingeki no Kyojin show…or, er, world… I mean… ugh, whatever. At least there was nothing creepy-looking here that most definitely would have screamed 'psycho killer'. Then again, maybe Ada had some secret dungeon where she kept all of her victims that I didn't know about.

_Stop scaring yourself, Tara. There is nothing weird here so get over it already. _

Right, okay. Moving on.

Ada gave me a quick tour around the house before leading me to the bathroom. She said I was welcome to use the bath and wash myself up while she prepared the dinner. I happily took the offer, as I felt like a rat that had been living in the sewers a little too long.

The water was… cold_er,_ than what I was used to. It wasn't exactly freezing, but it wasn't hot either. My guess was that they just didn't have the luxury of hot water here, which made me feel a little panicked. Would I have to live with only _lukewarm_ water here? Call me spoiled, but I liked my bathes to be long and _warm._ Another habit I would probably have to get rid off while here.

I didn't stay in the old-fashioned bathtub too long, as the water only got colder and dirtier with every passing minute.

_Look at how filthy you were before._

I scrunched my nose in disgust at the sight of the brown murky water in the tub.

_Gross…_

I quickly got dressed in some of Ada's old (and large) clothes that she had been by to drop off, before running a hand through the damp, soft, waves of hair on my head.

During the house tour, I had quickly come to realize that mirrors aren't that popular here, meaning there only existed _one_ (as far as I knew), which was placed in the bathroom. It was oval with no frame, and placed neatly on top of the windowsill. I found myself walking towards the mirror, curious as to what I looked like without all of the dirt.

I blinked at my reflection for a moment before leaning closer to it, curling my fingers around the windowsill for support. I really was just a child now. A little snotty brat.

I wrinkled my nose and stuck my tongue out, trying out all possible expressions on this new face. I chuckled and continued to make silly faces. What captivated me most were this child's eyes. They were very… expressive. They made every emotion I felt double up ten-fold. It was different from my previous life where I easily could pull off a poker face that lasted an entire day.

Deciding enough was enough; I exited the bathroom and headed for the kitchen where Ada was cooking dinner.

_Maybe all of this really is going to be all right. _

If I was lucky, Ada and her family would let me stay here. We could all live here happily until the day Wall Maria was breached and then, hopefully, we would all make it in one piece to live inside Wall Rose. As long as we weren't currently living in Shiganshina, the chances of surviving the fall of Wall Maria would most certainly increase. I wasn't sure of which town we were in at the moment, but surely Fate wouldn't be so cruel as to kill me, send me to the Shingeki no Kyojin world _and_ have me live in the Shiganshina district.

I didn't want to join the military. Out of all people, I knew it would be an absolutely suicidal act. Not to mention, I didn't feel like putting my life on the line for no apparent reason whatsoever. I wasn't much of a hero either. So joining the military would make no sense for me.

All in all, I had decided not to mend with anything in this world. Not the main characters and not the plot. I _had_ heard of the chaos theory's 'Butterfly Effect'. It goes that even the minor perturbations like the flaps of a distant butterfly's wings, can influence a hurricane. If possible, I would like to avoid being the butterfly that causes chaos everywhere. Even if it meant giving up on meeting my favorite characters from the show, it was for the better of both the plot and my own well-being. I would rather not test my luck to see if the universe was willing to give me a third chance at living. So I would have to give up on my favorite characters instead. I guess I would never get the chance to give Captain Levi the squealing fangirl hug I had always wanted.

With a final step, I entered the small kitchen. Ada was keeping track of some sort of stew in an old casserole, and I noticed she had already set the table for five people. I shifted my gaze curiously to the boy who was already seated by the table. He looked a lot like Ada, with the same blonde hair, blue eyes and pudgy nose. Upon further inspection, he looked a lot like –

I froze.

_You have got to be motherfu – _

"Ah, Tara," Ada said, turning away from her stew and walking towards the table. Squatting down, she put a gentle arm over the boy's shoulder, "this is my son, Armin." She turned to the boy, a bright smile on her face. "Armin, this is Tara."

I could practically hear fate laughing in my ear. I could feel how the earth was rumbling with the universe's loud snickers. And I could see how my plan was slowly, but steadily, sinking to the bottom of the dark ocean, never to be seen again.

…_Shit._

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><p><strong>AN: A bit of a different reincarnation-themed story, though I'm not even sure you can call this reincarnation. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the chapter.**

**Feedback is very appreciated. **


	3. My New Life as a Snotty Brat

So I was going to be honest and just get it out:

Waking up in the body of a child actually wasn't that bad.

While it sucked that people were now _treating_ me like a child, the whole "having to act like a kid" wasn't really that difficult. Admittedly, I knew I was never one of the most mature people in the world, which is probably why I enjoyed being a kid again as much as I did. It was great!

As for the whole "living in the world of Shingeki no Kyojin"… yeah, I was still trying to get used to the thought of that.

So it had been close to five months since I was dumped on this hell of a planet. During those five months, I had been living with the Arlert family. I guess you can say they had sort of "unofficially" adopted me, meaning we never really discussed the topic. They just sort of took me in, and after a while, Ada started saying things like, "Armin, go help your sister lay the table," or "Hello, this is my son Armin and my daughter Tara".

Needless to say, I was quite stunned the first time Ada referred to Armin as "my brother" and to the rest of the family as "my family". It was quite an awkward situation really. I didn't know what to say, and ended up simply standing there and staring at her, like the creepy child I surely was.

And while I was still getting used to all of this, I'd say I had made progress since five months ago.

…Okay, that was a total lie.

Well, not when it comes to Armin. The two of us got along surprisingly well actually, which I found weird, considering we were so different from each other. But maybe that was the reason in the first place why we got along so well? Idon'tevenknowanymore. What I did know is that I was happy about the fact that we got along, because if we didn't, we would both be pretty screwed as we shared the same bedroom.

Now, as for the rest of the family… I would have to say _'eh'_ to that. It's not like we didn't get along, it's just… well, me. I was just not really sure of how to act around them. Ada had said on multiple occasions to call her 'mom', as well as to address the others as 'dad' and 'grandpa'. And while I did try, it just still felt a little weird.

As if that wasn't enough, I got very socially awkward whenever left alone with them. While I mostly spent my time with Armin 24/7, I didn't get to interact as much with the rest of the family. Which meant, whenever Armin _wasn't_ around, I turned into this socially awkward turtle. You know, hid myself under the shell as well as possible.

Social awkwardness aside, I had also been spending most of my time in the presence of none other than Eren Jaeger, the protagonist of the whole story, the boy who is indeed a Titan Shifter. Though at the moment he was a total brat, so let's scratch all right now.

Armin had Eren and I introduced to one another about a week after I ended up here. Needless to say, I was a large wreck of unsteady nerves walking on two legs that day. Who wouldn't be? It was the day I had to meet Eren _freaking_ Jaeger. If we didn't get along, or if the boy just didn't like me, it would definitely create some issues.

Lucky for me, Eren didn't seem to mind my odd personality. In fact, the kid practically welcomed me with open arms into his and Armin's wacky little gang. I think part of the reason for this might have been because I'm "Armin's adoptive sister" and the whole "your friends are my friends"-sort-of-deal.

At any rate, back to social awkwardness, this was all the reason for my current position, which was walking through the small streets of Shiganshina. As Armin had something he needed done, I decided to take a walk not to be stuck in the living room with gramps and having to keep up awkward conversations.

Mentally facepalming myself for being stupid enough to get in this situation, I secured the satchel hanging against my hip. The bag was quite small, and made out of brown cheap cotton – the ones made of leather were too expensive for Ada to want to buy. While the satchel wasn't important, it was really the _inside_ of it that was of real value.

I had decided it would probably be a good idea to write down everything I knew about Shingeki no Kyojin, before I forgot about it again. At first, I didn't really feel like it, though the thought had crossed my mind. It wasn't until I had a nightmare about a Titan chomping my hair off that I was traumatized into doing it. In my defense, I really liked my hair.

I knew with time I would probably have to join the Survey Corps. I had known right from the beginning. From the moment Ada introduced Armin and I, I knew my fate was sealed. Yes, yes, nobody was deliberately _forcing_ me to join, but… I just sort of didn't want Armin and Eren to go without me.

Anyway, _because of this_, I decided it would be a good idea to write down everything I remember from the plot of Shingeki no Kyojin (after the horrific nightmare of course). In the future, I would most likely forget some important key points in the storyline, and if that happened, I know I would hate myself for forgetting. So I had been writing _everything_ down that I remembered in a small notebook I had convinced Ada to buy for me. It was very detailed descriptions too, both of the plot and of who died, when it happened and how it happened.

And because I was slightly paranoid, I made sure to never leave the house without my satchel with the notebook of detailed information in it. After all, it would suck if I lost the book during the fall of Wall Maria.

My feet skipped to a halt on the pavement, as I spotted a certain someone sitting by himself in front of one of the waterholes running alongside Shiganshina's streets.

I brought my hand up to scratch a spot on my ear that was itching and then started to make my way toward the brunette boy.

"What's up Eren?" I greeted him, slumping down on the soft grass beside him. "You philosophizing over the great endless abyss of life?"

Eren shot me a rather confused look, scrunching his nose in thought.

Yeah, while they had gotten used to _me_, they hadn't exactly gotten used to the weird way I surely talk sometimes. It does happen once in a while that I would forget we were currently in year 482 in an off-dimensional world where 21st century phrases and songs did not exist.

I quickly changed the subject.

"What are you thinking about?"

Eren diverted his eyes to the blue sky above us, seeming to be deep in thought. "Not anything in particular, really."

…

Okay, then.

"You want me to leave you and the sky alone, or…?" I asked cheeky, grinning at the boy by my side.

Eren simply rolled his eyes at me, and then brought a hand up to lightly shove me in the shoulder, making me laugh.

"Eren! Tara!"

I twitched at the sudden call of my name, both Eren and I clasping our mouths together in surprise. Shifting my position on the warm grass, I leaned forward to peek past Eren by my side, not particularly surprised to find Armin running toward us.

"Hi, Armin." I greeted the blonde boy with a smile, as he stopped beside us, heaving in a few quick breathes.

"What's up, Armin?" Eren asked, diverting his gaze from the sky above us.

I couldn't help but notice the large and very old looking book in Armin's hands. It looked as if the book had been occupied hiding in the back of some dusty library for years, hiding from all humanity as well as possible. _Well, sorry book, but now that Armin has found you, your days of hiding is over. That boy is gonna read the hell out of you._

…

…That sounded a bit weird.

"Grandpa secretly had this!" Armin exclaimed rather excited. With that look in his eyes, I wouldn't even be surprised if he had already taken the opportunity to kiss the cover of the book a few times.

That was another thing to add to the list over "how different Armin and I were, despite being non-blood related siblings". He _actually_ liked books. I didn't. In fact, I believe I might be allergic to books. I swear, whenever someone told me I _had_ to read a book, I would get this sudden urge to start sweating through my eyes.

Weird, huh?

I wondered if walking around with that notebook in my satchel 24/7 was contradicting myself? But then again, it was more for safety reasons than anything. You know, it was a self-written "how to keep yourself alive" sort of book. It was for practical reasons more than anything.

"It's a book about the outside world!" Armin went on, making me raise an eyebrow in question.

_So what?_ What was so special about a book about the outside world?

"A book about the outside world?!" Eren exclaimed in disbelief, straightening himself up to eye Armin.

And still my question remained – WHAT WAS SO FREAKING SPECIAL ABOUT A BOOK ABOUT THE OUTSIDE WORLD?!

"Isn't it illegal to have those? You're gonna get arrested!"

…

…_Oh._

Thanks for answering my question, I guess.

"This is no time to be saying that!" Armin blurted out, quickly squatting down and thrusting his little head closer to Eren and I, making me blink in surprise.

_Armin, what did I say about invading my personal space? It's a big no-no._

Why I didn't say said thoughts aloud actually surprised me. In my old life I wouldn't have hesitated even the slightest about letting Armin know that he needed to back off a bit. But for some reason, I couldn't make myself say it now. Maybe it had to do with the way his large blue eyes were almost sparkling and his cheeks were flushed pink from excitement? I guess a part of me just didn't want to ruin this for him…

…Yet at least.

"According to this book, most of the world is covered in bodies of water called 'oceans'!" The blonde boy explained, his eyes flickering between Eren and I. "And this 'ocean' is entirely saltwater!"

"Salt?!" Eren repeated, sounding both amazed and skeptical. "Y-you're lying! Salt is ridiculously valuable! I'm sure merchants would've snatched it all up!"

"You can't, though!" Armin argued thrilled, leaning even closer. "The ocean is so big it can't be depleted of salt!"

I'm pretty sure my mouth was hanging ungracefully open in shock at this very moment. Were they actually discussing whether we can deprive salt from the ocean? I mean, I know it was possible, but did these two even know exactly _how_ important the ocean was? The world ocean is integral to all known life. It forms part of the carbon cycle, and influenced climate and weather changes. It was the main reason there was even life on this planet!

But then again, how would they know? Come to think of it, how would anyone within these walls know? Being caged in like this, the only things people could rely on was the knowledge of books and rumors from _before_ the walls were built. But it's not like anyone could actually confirm it. All they could do was blindly believe in this stuff…

"Yeah, right –" Eren said, but cut himself off. Looking at Armin, I could understand why.

I don't ever think I had seen anyone so excited about anything before. I was _this_ close to believing that there were actually stars twinkling in Armin's eyes.

"And there is a lot more than a massive amount of salt!" Armin went on, as Eren simply stared at the boy in mild astonishment.

I couldn't help but beam out of pure joy, almost feeling as if Armin's excitement was contagious and had infected me. I shifted so that we were all three sitting in a small triangle, and then turned my silly grin to Armin.

"I wanna see!"

Armin placed the book in the middle of our mini huddle, opening it up and turning to one of the first pages. Both Eren and I stared in wonderment at the paintings and paragraphs of words in the old book.

"Look!" Armin pointed to one of the paintings. "There is water that burns, land covered in ice and massive tracts of sand! The outside world must be many times larger than the inside of these walls!"

"The outside world…" Eren breathed, simply staring in silent awe at the book laid in front of us.

_It's odd,_ I realized. Looking at these two boys, I finally seemed to register what being secluded behind a bunch of walls really could do to you. I never realized how these people were truly living in the dark. In my previous life, knowing these things was simply natural. It was something _everyone_ grew up knowing one way or another. Unlike Armin and Eren, I knew that this 'burning water' was really called lava. I knew what the 'lands covered in ice' looked like, despite never having visited the North and South Pole, because for me and my previous life, knowing that was simply a given. And though I had never tried it, I knew that these 'massive tracts of sand', also referred to as desserts, was a place you just did not want to be stuck in.

But how would these two ever know?

It was in this very moment I realized just how different this world was from the previous world I lived in. Though it was ultimately the same planet, things were as different as night and day. People _lived_ for different reasons. People wished to achieve different knowledge for different reasons.

"Hey, Tara, Eren." Armin suddenly exhaled, making me snap out of my daze and look up from the book. "I hope we can explore the outside world ourselves someday."

_Even the children differ. Though they may have the same wish, ultimately, it's for very different reasons…_

All of this really was odd.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: This chapter was a bit shorter than expected... sorry about that.**

**Thank you so much everyone who reviewed, alerted or/and added this to their favorites - I'm really glad you are all enjoying the story so far.**

**Feedback is appreciated. **


	4. A Master Plan of Revenge Gone Wrong

"Leave him alone!" I shouted, struggling against the arms wrapped tightly around my shoulders. Grunting, I stomped my heel as hard as I possibly could on top of my assault man's foot. I raised my free elbow and shoved it backwards, hitting the guy right beneath the ribs. If I hadn't been in the body of a ten-year-old child, my attack would have done a lot more damage. Instead of the dramatic reaction I was hoping for, the guy simply cried out in pain, but continued to hold onto me.

Eren yelled some incoherent threat, and then proceeded to throw a fist at the blonde guy who was currently occupied bullying Armin. The guy howled from the impact, and decided to leave Armin alone for the moment and go for Eren instead. The large teenager threw a punch at Eren, hitting him right in the jaw and making the brunette stumble back.

As usual, my and Eren's attempt at prying Armin's bullies off wasn't off to a great start. The fights were never fair to begin with; it was three large teenage douchebags against us three small kids. At this very moment, I feared this fight might turn out like the previous ones, which meant Armin, Eren and I would be walking home with bruised and scratched limbs. Why did these guys always pick on Armin anyways? Did they get some sort of sick kick out of it?

Then, just as all hope seemed lost and I had readied myself for the upcoming pain, a quick black flash whipped across the pavement.

Almost like a shadow, unnoticed and swift, she was there, her long black hair swaying with the quick movements of her feet and her dark eyes calm, but hard. In the blink of an eye, Mikasa was placed in-between the blonde bully and Eren, her right fist raised and placed against the teenager's nose in a merciless punch. A sickening crack was heard, and then the guy was lying on the ground, screaming and sobbing in pain from the hit.

Making a graceful turn on her feet, Mikasa ran in my direction, quickly disappearing to a place somewhere behind me. The next thing I knew, the guy holding me to his chest cried out and fell to the floor, finally letting go of me. Falling forward, my feet stumbled for a bit in an attempt to regain my footing, and by the time I looked up from the ground, the third guy had already been taken out, lying _unconscious _by Mikasa's feet.

Silence…

Mikasa moved to help Armin up from the ground, and then turned to face Eren.

"I told you to wait for me." She said expressionless, not seeming bothered the least by the fact that she just took out three guys twice her size.

"Right…" Eren simply said, his face looking both confused and shocked. I pulled in a breath and raised my hand to my neck, massaging it for a bit before cracking it from side to side.

I never realized she was _this_ strong.

* * *

><p>Exactly a year and a half had passed by ever since I arrived in this world. And yes, in case you hadn't already figured it out, Mikasa had now joined our little odd group. A few months had passed by since Mikasa's family was brutally murdered by those criminals and the Jaeger family adopted her.<p>

For the time being, I would have to say that my general view of Mikasa remained neutral. While it had only been two months, I felt that I was having a hard time bonding with her. Unlike Armin and Eren, Mikasa was a lot more withdrawn and quiet, only speaking when necessary. This was probably the reason I didn't feel like I had gotten that close with her yet, as I had grown accustomed to constantly talking with Armin and Eren. In the end, I think we just both needed a little time to get used to each other.

On the plus side, now that Mikasa was here, Armin, Eren and I didn't walk home looking like somebody just ran us over with a truck. Because that girl was _ridiculously_ strong, especially for a nine-year-old, and whenever those bullies tried anything, she would knock them out probably quicker than an adult was capable of. And while a general description of Mikasa would be "shadow", because of her withdrawn personality, quiet presence and dark hair (yes, let's not forget that pretty hair of hers), I actually viewed her as more of a Guardian Angel. She was always watching over Armin, Eren and I, and was quick to strike if we were in trouble. Admittedly, I felt a lot safer with Mikasa around.

"It's not fair!" Eren exclaimed in rage, making me look up from the ground. I felt my own face go in a pout. "Why is it always us they pick on?!"

"Because anything that has to do with the outside world is taboo." Armin answered, as always having a good response to the many questions Eren and I would throw around.

I pursed my lips in irritation at the response and kicked away a small conveniently placed rock on our path. Didn't those jerks have something better to do than pick on small children? I mean, come on! I was bored too a lot as a teenager, but I would never beat up kids simply for the fun of it. If you do something like that, I would assume you don't have a life. At all. Which was sad. At least I used my time living on the Internet. Come to think of it, the horrific inability to no longer have access the Internet had really been getting to me lately. I missed my computer!

Still, I wished there was some way of really hurting those bullying assholes. It obviously couldn't be anything physical, as I at the moment was too weak for that. It had to be something else. Something that still gave me the satisfaction of hurting them, even if it wasn't physical. I wonder what on earth that could be…?

_Ding-ding!_ If this had been a cartoon, a large glowing light bulb would most likely have appeared above my head right about now.

And so, an idea in the mind of Tara Yandell was born.

"Say, guys…" a large dark grin slowly spread across my lips, as the plan took form in my head, "you up for a little revenge?"

Three curious pair of eyes were now resting on me.

_For this plan to work, I'm gonna need money, a stalker, and my own personal bitch. _

* * *

><p>"Tara, I'm not sure this is a good idea." Armin murmured nervously, eyeing the large carton in my hands, I had him and Eren buy earlier today.<p>

"Sure it is," I answered him, smirking in satisfaction as I opened the carton up. Sixteen white fresh eggs were all lined up nicely and ready for whatever may come. _This is gonna be great._ "You just have to get in the mood first."

Yes, we were indeed going to egg this bastard's house.

Eren on my other side shot the eggs an almost suspicious look, before diverting his eyes to look at me. "So how do we do this?"

_I swear, these kids just don't know how to have fun. Even when the definition of 'fun' is right in front of their eyes, they just don't know what to do with it. Lucky I'm here then._

Heaving in a patient breath, I picked up a random egg and handed it over to Eren; the brunette looked as if the egg was a grenade or something, ready to blow him all the way to the moon.

A few seconds passed by in utter silence.

"Now what?" Eren asked, throwing a rather skeptical look my way.

"Now," I said, pointing a small finger up at the house in front of us. Mikasa and I acted as the stalkers and followed the leader of the bully-group to this specific house. We then waited to make sure he left again, and then went to retrieve the boys. When this mongrel finally came home, he would be in for a nice surprise. "You take your best aim and throw the egg with all your might."

Eren sighed, twirling the white egg around between his fingers. It looked like he was thinking the whole idea through one more time. Armin and Mikasa were watching him with cautious eyes.

Everything was silent.

Then, seeming to make up his mind, Eren clutched his fingers around the egg, thrust his arm back and took aim. Taking one final breath, Eren threw his arm forward and unclutched his fingers.

We all watched with large eyes as the egg flew through the air, before colliding with a _splat_ against the bricks of the house. Small pieces of eggshells and yolk splattered everywhere in an odd mix of white and yellow.

I threw my head back in a loud fit of laughter, making sure not to lose the carton of eggs in my hands. Eren turned to me with a rather satisfied and entertained grin on his face.

"Give me another one."

Handing a new egg over to the boy, I continued to laugh loudly as Eren threw the white object and hit the left side of the window.

"Your turn, Mikasa." I chuckled, handing an egg over to the dark-haired girl.

Mikasa looked at the raw egg with a deadpanned expression, before quickly grabbing a hold of it and throwing it toward the house. The egg splattered right in the middle of the window, seeming to leave a crack behind.

_Wow, she is good._

"Impressive." I said, still staring at the window in complete awe.

"The window broke…" Armin murmured.

_Yeah, but that's what happens when you have fun, Armin. Things break._

"My turn!" I exclaimed, quickly grabbing an egg from the carton. I aimed for the windowsill, so that when the bastard returned home, maybe he would use a few minutes to admire our handiwork and, if fate was on my side (which it usually wasn't) some of the yolk might fall and splatter on top of his ugly head.

"THIS. IS. SPARTA!" I roared at the top of my lungs and in the manliest voice I could muster, while flinging my arm forward and throwing the egg toward the windowsill. Armin, Eren and Mikasa all shot me a look of shock and mild confusion.

After having spent a few seconds on admiring my genius-revenge plan, I turned to Armin and handed over an egg to him. "Your turn."

Armin looked from me, to the egg, and then back to me, uncertainty and nervousness written all over his face. I gave him a smile in encouragement, and then, like the understanding sister I surely was, gave him a rather hard smack on his shoulder blade. Armin stumbled forward from the impact, nearly losing the egg in his hand in the process of regaining his balance.

Heaving in an anxious breath, Armin threw his arm back with the egg and took aim.

A few seconds of silence.

And then without further ado, Armin threw the egg toward the house. It ended up hitting the wall on the lower part of the house, splattering all over the renaissance architecture and staining it a yellow color.

'_Hello, Captain? This is Tara Yandell speaking. The mission was a success.'_

"Woo, Armin!" I cheered in a jump of victory, quickly grabbing a new egg and handing it over to the blonde boy. Now with a proud smile on his face, Armin threw another egg at the house.

Armin asked to throw a third egg. Eren grabbed one for himself. Mikasa commented she wouldn't mind trying again. And me being greedy, I tried to throw two eggs at the same time. I laughed at the one time Mikasa managed to make a crack in the wall by throwing an egg too hard, while Armin commented that the people in the house hopefully either had the money to fix it, or didn't mind an ugly crack. Eren and I ran over to smear the insides of a splattered egg all over the door, painting ugly smiley-faces that quickly got ruined, as the yolk dripped down. At one point, I'm pretty sure I even saw Mikasa's lips curl upwards and into a smile, even if it was a little one.

Before we knew of it, there was only one egg back in the carton.

"You throw it, Armin," Eren said, handing the egg over to his friend. I crumbled the now empty carton up, and then threw it indifferently over my shoulder, while nodding along to Eren's statement, "give those jerks one last piece of your mind."

Armin gratefully accepted the egg, smiling up at all of us in appreciation. I couldn't help but grin back, throwing my arms behind my back and balancing back and forth on my feet. We all watched excited, as Armin got ready to throw the last remaining egg. _I wonder if all of this will have a bad influence on him? Nah, if anything, it will teach him to stand more up for himself._

Armin took his aim, throwing his arm back and –

_Why is the door moving?_

With a loud creak, the door was thrown open, and out walked a 6'6 meter tall muscular man. The man looked to be in his mid-forties, with a nearly bald head and biceps twice the size of my head. The look on his face did not exactly scream 'happy'.

Then, before any of us could register the current situation, Armin thrust his arm forward and threw the last egg in his hand.

The egg hit the man with a splat right in the face, yolk running down his temples and chin, and staining his shirt.

…

…Fuck.

"What the hell do you sly brats think you're doing?!"

Silence.

"…Decorating your house?" I tried nervous, taking a step back in precaution.

"You threw eggs all over my house!" The man roared. His head was so red with anger, I was wondering if the egg would turn into a fried egg. You know, just like in the cartoons.

"Yeah…" I murmured, uncertain of what to say. This was the first time I had ever gotten caught while egging somebody's house or car. Who even was this guy? Was he the father of Armin's bully? That was some daddy to have. Seems legit…

I decided to take this as a chance to silently ask the other three what to do now. Nobody noticed my questioning stare…

Armin literally looked like he was about ready to leek his pants. Eren simply had that same expression as a child who was just caught doing something very bad (which he had, so…). Finally, Mikasa looked like she couldn't care less, simply standing with an indifferent expression on her face and staring with uncaring eyes at the large man approaching us.

"Little rats… I'm gonna rip your fucking arms off!" The man shouted in such rage that I swear it felt as if the ground shook. Eren inhaled a sharp breath, Mikasa narrowed her eyes, Armin gulped, and I winced at the livid picture popping up in my head.

You know how people often yell empty threats at you? And whenever it happens, you just _know_ they're not being serious, but are simply trying to make a statement? And in the end everybody goes home happy? You know, a little death threats here and there, and then you eventually make up with the person?

Yeah, that was not the case this time.

This guy really was going to rip our arms off.

"Time to make a run for it~" I sang under my breath, taking another step back. I curled my fingers around Armin's wrist, and used my other hand to pull in Eren and Mikasa's shirts.

"Eh…?" Armin murmured, seeming to be almost paralyzed with shock at the moment. Eren was still staring with wide eyes at the man that looked like he could easily be a wrestler or boxer. Mikasa's dark eyes darted over to meet mine, a silent agreement passing between us. _Glad we're on the same page._

The bodybuilder-daddy tightened his large fists, his knuckles turning white. Another large step was taken in our direction.

"Like, NOW!" I yelled, spinning Armin around on his heels. Mikasa and Eren were pretty damn quick to react on my command, both of them turning to run in the opposite direction of Big Daddy.

Our sudden attempt at fleeing seemed to trigger something in Big Daddy, as he suddenly made the same sound of that of a T-Rex dinosaur (?), and started running for us.

He was angry.

_No shit, Sherlock._

Eren, Armin, Mikasa and I, all ran down the closest alleyway, our feet padding loudly against the stone pavement. The sound of grunts and heavy footsteps could be heard right behind us.

Eren was in the front, having taken upon the role of leading us all through Shiganshina's streets, while Mikasa was inches behind him (though I bet she could easily outrun him). I think she was just keeping an eye on him.

In a situation like this, you usually don't want to be in the back. Because it's the person in the back that always gets snatched first. Admittedly, in my previous life, I would have probably just found a good escape route and left these three behind. Every man for himself.

But for some reason, at the moment, what was worrying me the most was poor Armin getting his arms ripped off, because he was so slow. I didn't want Armin to lose his cute little child-arms! Though in the long run, maybe it would keep him from joining the Survey Corps…?

_Terrible idea, Tara._

Nobody was losing their arms today. I had to make sure of that. After all, this whole thing was my idea in the first place. Don't grown-ups always say that you have to take responsibility for your actions? So that's what I' would do. No running off and saving my own skin this time. I had to –

WAS THAT AN AXE BIG DADDY WAS RUNNING WITH?!

_Holy –! _

Time to speed up.

"RUN LIKE A BOSS, ARMIN!" I screamed, tugging at his hand and increasing my own speed. The pavement beneath my thumping feet turned blurry from the sudden increase of speed. At this point, I'm pretty sure Mikasa could feel me breathing down her neck. Out of all things, I just had to get stuck with the slowest brother in the world. I bet it was Fate's doing again. I really hated that thing.

"Slow down, Tara!" Armin yelped, tugging at my hand in the opposite direction.

_Slow down? Armin! The guy has a freaking axe! He is not gonna rip our arms off – he is gonna _chop_ them off like a piece of meat!_

My free hand slapped against the cold wall of a house, as Eren suddenly made an abrupt turn to the right. I felt Armin's fingers tighten around mine, as he slipped across the ground from the sudden turn, his other arm wailing to the side for support. Another pull in the hand and Armin was quick to continue the flight with only a quick faltering stumble. I pulled in a ragged breath through my nose and out through my mouth, before launching into full speed again.

Honestly, I didn't even know where we were anymore. All that mattered at the moment was getting away. To where that might be, I didn't know and I didn't really care either. And at the moment, I didn't really see us getting away. Running aimlessly obviously didn't seem to work when it came to losing this dude.

A few more blocks passed, and then I finally realized what we had to do.

Up ahead, the pavement was turning into three different possible ways to enter. The pathways were all created by a bunch of close-standing houses that constructed three small alleys. _Guess there is no other choice, then. _

"Eren! Mikasa!" I shouted, already beginning to change my direction. Both children turned their heads around to shoot me a confused look. "We'll lose him by splitting up!"

A silent agreement from Mikasa and a nod from Eren, and our little group split in two. Mikasa and Eren ran for the alley placed on the furthest left side, while Armin and I ran for the one placed furthest on the right. The middle alley was left empty.

If we were lucky, which I highly doubt we were, Big Daddy would be stupid enough to run through the middle street. If not, then he might run after Eren and Mikasa who I bet would be able to outrun him eventually. The whole point of this was actually for me and Armin to lose him, because I could tell Armin wouldn't be able to run for much longer.

There was a little more than a 33 percent chance that Big Daddy would follow Armin and I. This meant there was almost a 67 percent chance that he _wouldn't_. The odds were with us on this one. So _please_ oh-almighty powerful Fate, let him run through any other street than ours.

Loud bumps of heavy feet across the pavement, and heavy breathings were suddenly heard behind us.

…_Maybe there is a fat guy running behind us and trying to get in a better shape?_

"Tara, he is after us!"

I was personally going to come up there and give whoever controls this world a piece of my mind. And once I figured out how to do it, it would not be pretty. Why does this even keep happening? What did I ever do to piss the Universe off so much? As if killing me and reawakening me into this freaking place wasn't bad enough, it just _had _to –

Was it just me or did it look like the floor was moving?

In the last possible second, I realized that the floor wasn't particularly moving, but was actually water.

I instantly tried to stop, the back of my heels digging into the pavement and making a loud _screech_. I ended up stopping _inches_ away from the water, my feet placed by the end of the pavement. _That was too clo –_

Having forgotten about Armin behind me, I shrieked as I suddenly felt someone colliding harshly with my back. The impact made my feet stumble forward and my eyes widen to a creepy size. I thrust my arms to the side and started to flail with them wildly, like a bird learning to fly for the first time, in an attempt to regain my balance. My feet were tipping back and forth right at the edge, desperately trying to steady themselves.

Just as I thought my balance was lost and I was going to fall in the water, I felt a pair of hands digging themselves into the back of my shirt and pull me back.

As soon as I was safe and in no danger of getting wet, I released a sigh of relief.

"Now I've got you, you little bags of shit."

_Crap. We're not out of the danger zone yet._

My eyes darted back and forth in a panicking attempt to try and find a new escape route. However, after having practically searched every little corner there might be, I realized something very crucial.

We were trapped.

The alley Armin and I ran down led to a long, linear canal waterway. Every house, architecture, street, or whatever else you might find here, all ended by the watercourse. The only way out of here was to run the same way back.

I turned around stiffly, eyeing our one way out of here, as well as the axe-wielding man who was currently standing in the middle of it.

Yes, our only way out was indeed blocked by Big Daddy.

Things just went from _bad_ to _worse_ to _I-am-going-to-freacking-kick-a-puppy-once-I-get-home-if-I-survive-this!_

_The Universe really gets a kick out of screwing around with me, doesn't it?_ If I was alone at this very moment, I most likely would have raised a clenched fist and turned to the sky, shouting, "_Fate, why you do this to meeeee?!"_

Unfortunately, I was not, meaning all I could do was visualize the reenactment in my mind.

"Thought you could get away, did ya?" Big Daddy grunted, a sickening smirk now appearing on his lips. With the way he was currently standing with that cackling grin and craze in his eyes, he sort of reminded me of the Joker.

I pulled another breath in through my nose, and then slowly exhaled, trying to clear my mind. Turning to face the waterway by my feet, I scrunched my nose in disgust. The water was murky and had a disgusting green color, and I could only imagine what sort of things must be living in it. It would most definitely do horrific things to my skin, not to mention the stench would most likely stick with me for weeks.

"Say, Armin," I mumbled, wrapping my fingers around the boy's wrist, "do you know how to swim?"

"Eh?" Armin murmured absentmindedly, staring with wide eyes at the 250 pounds man slowly approaching us. I gave him a gentle tug in the arm, making the boy snap out of his daze and turn to face me. "Ah, yes. Dad taught me a few years back. Why do you want to know…?"

_Because we are going for a little dip._

"Good. On three, we jump." I said, cracking my neck a few times and mentally thanking myself for leaving the bag with my notebook back home, since I was afraid I might get egg all over it.

"What…?" Armin shot me a disbelieving look.

"One." I bended in my knees, lifting my toes and rocking a bit back and forth, gracefully balancing on the balls of my feet.

"What do you mean we –?"

"Two."

T-Tara, wait…!"

"THREE!"

I pushed my body off with my legs and set off, my feet permanently leaving the pavement. While my feet rolled forward, I made sure to tighten my grip on Armin's wrist. The boy was involuntarily dragged with me in the jump. Grinning madly, I threw a last glance in Big Daddy's direction.

"SAYONARA, MI AMIGO!"

"Tara…!"

And with that, Armin and I hit the water with a painful _smack_, just barely avoiding our inevitable death by the hands of an angry wrestler-daddy.

And there you have it – the story about how I promised myself _never_ to throw eggs at someone's house ever again. How did we get home, you ask? Let's just say it involved a load of swimming, saving Armin from drowning on multiple occasions, and the loss of my left shoe. Needless to say, I spent the following two days diving for it, but that damn thing never showed up again. Rest in piece my beloved left shoe.

In the end, one can only imagine the lies Armin and I had to come up with, when we finally made it home, soaked to the bone and most likely looking worse than a drowned cat.

Ah, the memories.

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><p><strong>AN: Tara is a bad influence - enough said. I hope everyone liked this chapter!**

**Feedback is appreciated.**


	5. Year 845

**A/N: I would just quickly like to thank all of you for the positive feedback and support this story had been given. Thank you! I'm really glad you are all enjoying it, as I'm having a blast writing it.**

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><p><em>[Humanity was suddenly reminded that day,<em>

_Of the terror of being at their mercy,_

_Of the humiliation of being trapped inside a cage…]_

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><p>I moaned in irritation from the tapping of sunlight against my face, the last remnants of a dream being chased away as my mind went out of its fuzzy mental state. I blinked a few times, then squeezed my eyes shut, hoping to shut the sun's piercing beams out, but to no avail. To say I missed curtains is an understatement. Yawning loudly, I sat up and stretched my arms to either side, whilst my eyes wandered to the small bed opposite mine, confirming that Armin, like usual, was already up and in no sight. No surprise there. While I enjoyed sleeping half of the day away, Armin was an oddball and liked to get up <em>early <em>in the morning. _Ugh, that word._ Still, the boy had been nice enough to go out of his way to be quiet not to wake me up.

Leaving the hard mattress of the bed that I had gotten used to over the past few years, I made my way to the small pile of clothes placed in the far end of the corner. I grabbed what was closest of the small selection, that being a dull-gray skirt, which I "accidently" ripped (so not an accident) a while back. I swear, Ada was furious, as clothes were are valuable. But seriously, I was already pissed about the fact that I wasn't allowed to wear pants, and so, I refused to wear a skirt that nearly reached the freaking ground. So I ripped half of it off, meaning it now reached my knees and the embarrassment of tripping over the fabric was no longer a reoccurring issue.

Admittedly, I missed wearing my skinny jeans and tank tops, despite having grown accustomed to the oversized, Stone Age clothes they had here. There was just something about using your mother's old shirts, and constantly having to roll the sleeves up and tugging it into the hem of the skirt not to look like a garbage bag – that made you look a lot less… attractive. Then again, I was physically still a damn kid, and the thought of not looking attractive should be one of my last concerns at the moment. Still, it bothered me.

Finishing the usual morning routine, I skipped down the stairs and entered the small kitchen, the only person present at the moment being my adoptive mother. Dad and gramps was most likely already out and working in the cornfields.

"Morning. Where's Armin?" I asked, noticing the blonde boy wasn't present either. I plopped down on the wooden chair by the dinning table, and started nipping to the bread on the untouched plate in front of me.

"Good morning, sweetheart." Ada beamed in her usual light and cheery voice, turning around from the sink to flash me a joyful smile. "Armin already left a while ago. I'm sure you'll find him with Eren and Mikasa."

I smiled back, quickly finishing my small breakfast, and then exited the house with a wave and a promise that both Armin and I would be back before dinner.

Once outside, I couldn't help but groan in exasperation and run a furious hand through the locks of wavy hair on my head. Couldn't he have waited for me? Whenever Armin was alone, bullies always managed to find him and pick on him for his, apparently, taboo interest in the outside world. Armin was too timid to defend himself against those morons, which usually wasn't a problem, so long as he was with either me (who beat them up), Eren (who beat them up) or Mikasa (who threw one look their way, making them run the opposite direction). But when he was by himself…

Sighing, I pulled the large sleeves of the shirt in place on my elbows, and then rushed through the small streets of Shiganshina, rudely pushing people aside in my search for the blonde boy. Not much time passed by, before I caught the sight of a familiar face.

My legs instantly skipped to a stop, and I started to call for him, waving my arms wildly in the air to catch the boy's attention.

"Eren!"

The scowling grimace on Eren's face quickly disappeared as he looked up from the ground, our eyes meeting; we both cracked a grin at the other.

"Hi, Tara."

I quickly ran over to the brunette, pulling in a ragged breath as I finally stopped. "What's up?"

Eren shrugged nonchalantly, as we both made a turn for one of the side streets, the disapproving scowl quickly returning on his features.

"Mikasa just tattled to our parents about my ambition of joining the Survey Corps."

Yes, Eren had more than once told me about how he would be joining the Survey Corps once we got older. He had even on several occasions dragged me along to watch as the soldiers returned from an expedition outside the walls. Admittedly, the only reason I ever willingly went along was so that I could try and spot Corporal Levi. Damn, I loved that guy.

"Oh." I murmured, a tad surprised that Mikasa would tell their parents about that. But then again, Mikasa usually did stuff like that if she believed it was the best for everyone – especially Eren. Still, I couldn't even begin to imagine the loud argument that must have broken out afterwards. "I'm guessing your parents weren't too fond of the idea."

Eren simply glared at the ground instead of responding, the anger radiating off of his body clear as day. I played with the tips of my hair indifferently, zoning out as Eren broke into an angry reenactment of what had happened, before deciding I might as well ask him if he knew anything about the thing I had been doing.

"Hey Eren, have you seen –"

"Shut up, Smart-ass!"

I snapped my head in the direction of the sudden voice, only to find the very person I had been looking for all morning, surrounded and squeezed up against a wall by three guys twice his own size. The guy closest to Armin had his fist raised, ready to punch him, and I instantly felt rage flaring up inside of me – as well as radiating off the boy beside me.

"Hey!"

"Stop that!"

Twitching their heads in our direction, both Eren and I picked up our speed and sprinted toward the group of bullies.

"It's Eren and Tara!" A wave of doubt and uncertainty seemed to take over the three boys, but was quickly erased by a bunch of smirks and raised fists. "We can take those brats! Two on three!"

Then, just as I had raised my fist and gotten ready to punch the fat one of the trio on the nose, all of them seemed to panic, and way too quickly, they turned around with their tales between their legs, running in the opposite direction.

"S-screw this! We're outta here!"

"Yeah, you better run!" I yelled after them, feeling nothing less than proud for making three guys twice my (physical) age and size run off. As soon as I had made it to Armin's side, I skipped to a halt along with Eren.

"One look at us and they ran off!" Eren exclaimed in surprise and satisfaction, turning to me with a large grin.

"Actually, it was Mikasa they saw…" Armin murmured, heaving himself up from the ground.

Looking behind me, I instantly felt my proud smile fade at the realization that Mikasa was indeed behind us the whole time, and was the one to scare them off. The sound of a painful groan took my thoughts elsewhere however, and I quickly rushed to Armin's side as he fell back to the ground.

"Armin, are you okay!?"

"Here…" I mumbled, gently taking a hold of his arm to help him up from the floor. Armin looked up at me in defeat, tears evident in his blue eyes, as well as multiple bruises and scratches on his cheeks and forehead. His expression then turned into that of exasperation as his head dropped to the ground.

"I can get up on my own…"

As if burnt by the touch, I quickly let go of Armin's arm again, taking a step back in surprise. I tried not to let his words get to me. Where did that come from all of a sudden?

Line!

"I said, humanity needs to venture into the outside world at some point…"

I sat in silence and listened as Armin explained his reason for getting picked on this time, pursing my lips together in anger and irritation, pretty much hating everything at the moment, but mostly, myself. Why? Because the whole episode with Armin getting beaten up had been giving me a sort of déjà vu feeling. And not the "Dammit, that's the fifty-sixth time you have gotten picked on, Armin!" sort-of-déjà vu. It was different. Along with the conversation currently unfolding, it was all making a very bad feeling appear in my stomach.

"Why does everyone look down on people just for wanting to go outside!?" Eren snarled, grabbing a rock and throwing it furiously into the water in front of us.

"Well, because we've had a hundred years of peace by staying inside the walls." Armin explained, making me grit my teeth frustration. _Like that's gonna hold._ "They're worried that going outside carelessly will invite 'them' inside the walls. The royal government's policies have made having any interest in the outside world a taboo."

_Screw the government, that's what!_

"It's our lives." Eren went on, looking just as frustrated as I felt. "We can risk 'em if we want."

"Absolutely not." Mikasa's voice cut through, making me look up from the ground in surprise at the sudden tad of anger in her voice. "Forget about it."

"Which reminds me," Eren said, giving Mikasa a blaming glare and making me roll my eyes – I had already heard this. I started to pull the grass out by its roots, waiting for the two to finish their argument, and listening as Armin asked into it.

I understood the reason Mikasa didn't want Eren to join the Survey Corps, I really did. She was afraid he would get killed the second he stepped outside the walls. While I agreed that it was risky, lately, I had realized that at this point it didn't even matter. In fact, I had come to the conclusion that if we all joined the military, we would have a better chance of survival. In the end, everything that was even remotely peaceful would fall apart soon. First, Wall Maria would fall. Next, Wall Rose would fall (followed by rebuilding it again). And finally, there would be a large fight between two Titan Shifters inside Wall Sina. Thinking this over, it had made me realize that there was no such thing as 'safe' inside these walls. And if we were to face one danger after the other anyway, why not gain some experience to increase our chances of survival?

"There is no saying this wall will hold." I blurted out; cutting Eren off in his midsentence and making all three kids turn their heads to look at me in surprise. I shifted a bit in my seat to get a better look of them, mainly keeping my eyes on Mikasa, since she was the one who thought staying here was safest, when really, it didn't even make a difference. The wall _would_ fall at some point, and though I couldn't exactly remember when, since it had been years since I watched _Shingeki no Kyojin_, I did remember that it happened in this year. It was something I had been trying to mentally prepare myself for, ever since getting here. Mikasa might not like it, but it was the truth…"At some point, the wall will break. Nature always finds a way with these things."

Eren looked a bit horrified at the though, and Mikasa, like usual, didn't crack any expression on her blank face, but simply stared back at me, seeming to be carefully listening. At first, Mikasa's constant emotionless face really unnerved me, but after a year of spending time with her, I was slowly getting used to it. Didn't mean I still had trouble reading her most of the time, of course.

Armin, however (and to my surprise), gave me a small nod, seeming to agree with me.

"Tara is right. I think people are crazy if they think we'll be safe inside these walls forever." Armin hugged his legs tightly to his chest, his mind seeming to be in deep thought. "Just because the walls haven't fallen for a hundred years, doesn't guarantee that they won't fall today…"

A short silence was followed.

_Fall today, huh?_ It was a scary thought, honestly. What made it even scarier was the fact that I _knew_ it would happen. I had seen the show, and I had seen what future lied ahead for all of us. And it was not a very pretty one…

I yelped as a loud sound of thunder echoed, followed by something deep down in the earth beginning to pound. The pounding quickly increased, until the entire ground was shaking violently beneath us, making all four of us fall to the side and connect painfully with the rocks. All sound was replaced by loud _snaps_, as if something was breaking.

But just as quickly as it came, it stopped again.

"W-what was that?" I heard Armin whisper in fear.

"An explosion?" Eren tried puzzled.

I looked up from the ground, feeling both confused and disoriented at what on earth just happened. Armin took a hold of my arm and pulled me up from the ground, and we all four gathered around in a small lump, staring ahead of us in bewilderment. The dark feeling in my stomach was slowly increasing…

"What are they looking at…?" I whispered, gesturing toward the small group of people a little further down the alley, pointing at something and murmuring questions to each other. _This isn't right. We should get out of here…_

And then, I felt Armin let go of my arm and run down the street toward the crowd of people. I instantly started to panic, and I quickly shuffled after him, along with Eren yelling for Armin to wait for us, and Mikasa in the back.

I barely managed to stop in time before colliding with Armin, who, along with the rest of the citizens, was staring straight ahead, their bodies unmoving and their faces sickly pale.

Unlike everyone else, I didn't dare turn around. Deep down in my stomach, I knew what was happening. The signs were so obvious now that I thought about it. I couldn't believe I hadn't realized any of this earlier.

My body was stiff as a stick and my eyes were wide with disbelief, staring straight at Armin beside me. The only thing I could was my pulse, beating loud in my eardrums and blocking out all other sound.

Clenching my shaking hands and holding my breath, I let my eyes slowly, but steadily, wander away from Armin's fear-struck face. I twisted my head stiffly to the side, and finally, I let my dilating eyes rest on a specific spot on Wall Maria.

_The Colossal Titan._

Its large skinless hand was clutched tightly around the edge of the wall, while the Titan's head slowly took form and appeared out of the gray dusty smoke.

_It's happening today._

Images of the horrifying event flashed before my eyes, clouding my vision with fear. Despite it being years ago that I last watched the anime, for some reason, this particular day suddenly stood out clear as day. Portrays of the citizens getting crushed by boulders, ripped apart, and eaten alive, all seemed to replay again and again in my mind. The terrible scene where Eren and Mikasa's mother was…

"You're kidding…" Armin blurted out in disbelief, breaking the deadly silence in the city. "That wall is fifty meters high!"

And yet somehow, nature found a way to create a Titan even larger than fifty meters.

"It's them…" Eren whispered, fear evident in his small voice. I felt a lump appearing in my throat, as a large shadow slowly ate its way across the ground simultaneously with the Titan's head looming over the wall. "Titans!"

_The wall! Get away from the wall! It's gonna kick it down!_

A deafening crash was heard, like thunder striking an object, followed by echoes of terrible screams, explosions and rumbles. Dust, rocks and bricks took over the sky, flying to the side and landing on top of houses placed close to us. I instantly froze, neither moving nor wincing as a small piece of rock managed to scratch the side of my cheek.

"H-he…" Armin fell to his knees beside me, stuttering and whimpering in his sentence, "Made a hole in the wall…"

My breath hitched in my throat at the realization that every Titan in the area now had a free ticket to enter the city. Sort of like a free buffet.

If reality hadn't hit me before, it certainly had now. And I did not like it. It was all too real. I knew this would happen, but it had not stopped me from living in a childish illusion where everything was safe and had happy endings. I had let ignorance get the better of me, and I had without questions been sticking to a particular viewpoint, simply because I refused to consider the alternatives.

I wanted to run.

I wanted to run as far away from here as possible and hide somewhere, where no one would ever find me. Whether it was up high in the mountains, or deep down at the bottom of the ocean – I didn't care. Anywhere but here…

I found myself panicking too quickly for my own brain to keep up. My eyes flickered back and forth, the adrenalin pumping loudly in my veins, as one word kept repeating itself in my mind, over and over again. _Run._ Run far, far away and don't look back. I knew how the drill went. I could easily get away from here quickly, despite the panicking and screaming people around me. I had had to flee countless times in my previous life, and I had quick reflexes, so I could easily zigzag between the herds of citizens and be one of the first people to reach the safety of the boats. _It would be so easy…_

"We need to get –" Armin whimpered, getting up from the ground and snapping me out of my thoughts. _No…_ I didn't want to be that selfish person any longer. I didn't want to be one of those scums that ran away and left their family and friends behind, though it was obviously the easier solution. I needed to pull myself together. If I could just clear my head and look at this with a less clouded mind… but it was so hard to think rationally in this situation. "Eren!"

_Crap!_

I felt my eyes dance across the crowd of people pushing past us, looking after the brown-haired boy, only to find him a good distance away from us, stumbling in the direction of the Titans.

"You two, don't!" I screamed, thrusting my hand out to get a hold of Mikasa before she ran after him. But my hand only grabbed a fist of air. _Crap! What do it do?! What do I do?!_ Should I run after them? Maybe if we were three, we would have a chance at saving Eren's mother. But what about Armin? Should I just leave him? Or should I get my own brother to safety first? I didn't know what the right thing to do was!

"It's over…" Armin whispered. I snapped my panicking head in his direction, watching as the boy clutched his shaking arm, his entire body trembling in fear. "The Titans have invaded this town."

_Pull yourself together, Tara!_ I might have the body of a child, but mentally, I was almost an eighteen year old – an adult! Armin was still just a little kid! I was the oldest and I had to take responsibility for him. I had to keep my head cold!

"Armin," I said, grabbing a hold of his shoulders with both of my hands and gently placing my feet in front of his. Staring right into his blue eyes, I made sure to not let any fear show on my face. "It's going to be okay. We're going to be all right. But we need to help Eren and Mikasa. You go get help and I'll run after them, got it?"

I didn't wait for an answer. Instead, I quickly let go of Armin and turned around on my heels, getting ready to sprint after Eren and Mikasa, hoping that with the strength of three kids, we might be able to free their mother in time for Hannes to carry her.

I barely got to take one step however, as I suddenly felt two shaking hands grab a hold of my wrist. Confused, I turned my head; my eyes being met with Armin's dilating, frightened and tear-filled blue ones.

"Armin…" I murmured, feeling a stab of guilt and despair in my stomach at the sight of the petrified boy, clinging on to my arm like it was life or death. But then again, maybe it was.

"P-please… don't leave me, Tara…" Armin begged, his hold around my wrist tightening, and his eyes growing larger with desperation. And then I realized, that Armin truly was just a little boy. A child who didn't know what to do with himself in such a terrifying situation as this. I couldn't leave him…

"Okay…" I whispered after a few stunned seconds. Armin's tight hold around my wrist eased up in relief. Twisting our hands around so that I was the one holding a tight grip around Armin, I spun the boy around and ushered him forward.

I turned my own head away from the hell behind us.

My eyes went into focus on the alley not too far from us that would be our escape.

My hold on Armin's wrist tightened.

The pads of my feet set off against the ground.

And then, I sprinted through the crushed town once known as Shiganshina, dragging Armin along.

I didn't go as fast as I could have for obvious reasons. Armin was never much of a runner, and even with the fear and adrenalin pumping through, he was nowhere near as fast as other people. The fact that the ground was covered with large rocks and broken pieces of buildings wasn't exactly helping either. While I managed to evade and jump over the reoccurring obstacles, almost like a video character in a game, Armin keept stumbling and losing his footage. I think my constant yanking on his wrist was making it that much harder.

It felt as if my body had gone into this mechanical sort of mode. _Left, faster, up, right, jump, pull, slower, down – _is what I kept repeating to myself.

Everything around me was blocked out. I have decided to keep my eyes on the target ahead, instead of the sickening scenes around us. I was quite literally forcing myself not to look to the side. Because I knew both of my sides were filled with crushed dead people, surrounded by their crying and moaning loved ones.

Despite the constant cries and wails for help, I didn't stop. I didn't even spare them one glance of sympathy. I simply kept running. I kept running, and I did not let anyone or anything stop me in my task at getting Armin and myself out of here.

_Left, faster, up, right, jump, pull, slower, down, left, faster, up, right, jump, pull, slower, down, left, faster, up, right, jump, pull, slower, down, left, faster, up, right, jump, pull, slow_–

"Tara!"

The sudden pull at my hand, in the opposite direction I was going, nearly made my feet slip and connect my butt painfully with the ground. I tried awkwardly to gain my footing again, without slipping, while my mind was swirling around with the question as to what on earth just happened.

"Wha…?" I murmured disoriented, twisting my head and looking back at Armin.

The boy pointed at something a little further ahead of us. "It's Hannes!"

_Hannes…?_ Following the direction of Armin's index finger, my eyes came to rest on said blonde soldier, who was currently helping an elder man out of his half-crushed house. My eyebrows scrunched together in confusion. _So what…?_

I had met Hannes a few times before, through Eren and Armin. While he often had seemed lazy and somewhat cowardly (not to mention drunk), I could tell the soldier meant well. He had sometimes shown a sweet caring affection for the four of us kids, often mock joking around with Eren (who took it very seriously).

By the time I realized what Armin truly had in mind, I had already been pulled across the ruined pavement and was standing in front of Hannes with Armin by my side.

"Hannes!" Armin shouted, somehow managing to overhear the constant cries, screams and pounds. The blonde soldier's head snapped in our direction, his eyes widening.

"What are you kids still doing here? Get to the boats!" Hannes yelled sternly, throwing his arm out and making a motion for Armin and I to keep moving.

"Eren and Mikasa ran back to their house!" Armin exclaimed. Hannes expression contorted into that of shock and dismay. "We have to help them!"

Murmuring something to the old man he had helped, Hannes ran toward Armin and I, squatting down in front of us and placing a stern hand on our shoulders.

"I'll go back for them." The soldier said, his eyes hard going from Armin to me. "Tara; hurry and take your brother to the boats. There won't be enough room for everyone to get on, so you have to go now."

I swallowed the lump in my throat and nodded stiffly. Linking our fingers, I pulled Armin in the direction Hannes pointed to and started to run for the boats. I could only hope and pray to whatever was up there that my mingling in the storyline hadn't changed anything.

I could only hope that Hannes made it to Eren and Mikasa to get them out alive.

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><p><strong>AN: And the wall has fallen. Let's see how Tara will handle the pressure in the future. **

**animagirl: Thank you! I will take your ideas (as well as your previous request) into consideration!**


	6. The Aftermath

I don't know how, but Armin and I had somehow made it to the boats. We had made it without getting eaten and without getting run down by the herds of panicking civilians. And somehow, we had secured ourselves a seat in one of the boats.

While watching the anime, I had often questioned what happened to Armin's parents. In the show, it was never made very clear. Which is why I felt so relieved when I realized Ada had gotten out of the house in time, and gramps and dad had made it out of the cornfields. For the moment, I realized Armin and I had been lucky.

Ada had broken down crying when she saw us. Armin and I were ushered onto a boat along with grandpa, while Ada and her husband had to take a different boat. All in all, it had all ended fairly well. That was of course, except…

"Do you see them?" I whispered, looking up from my spot on the boat. Armin's eyes danced across the crowd, but he didn't answer my question.

"Armin, sit down." Grandpa ushered, placing a hand on top of my hair in comfort.

"But Eren and Mikasa aren't here yet." Armin explained, glancing worried back into the crowd. I tensed at his words and went back to biting my bottom lip in thought. What if they didn't make it back? What if me being here had changed everything so that Hannes hadn't made it in time to help them? What if they were dead? Because of me? Oh god! I had killed Eren Jaeger – the protagonist of the story – and Mikasa Ackermann – one of humanity's strongest soldiers!

"They're there!"

I felt like crying and kissing fate's feet in gratitude.

Bolting out of my seat, I placed my arms on the boat railing and leaned over, looking in the direction Armin was pointing. Armin raised his arm and made a move to wave at them, but stopped.

"Eren…"

He looked… terrible. To say the least. The expression on his face was that of someone who had just witnessed the worst possible traumatizing experience. Part of me wanted to throw a few molesting-jokes, but the more rational part of me chose not to. This was serious. It didn't take a genius to figure out what must have happened...

"Now isn't a good time to talk to them." I heard grandpa say. Retracting my hands, I turned around and slid back down to sit beside him, guilt and self-loathing twisting uncomfortably in my stomach. "Those poor souls. You can tell what happened by looking at them."

Armin looked back at gramps in disbelief and slight confusion.

I buried my face in my knees and threw my hands over my ears in an attempt to block everything out.

I should have gone after them. How was I in any way doing the right thing by running off with Armin? I shouldn't have left them to just fend for themselves. It had _not_ been the right thing to do. Just by one look, I could tell Eren would never be the same. He had watched his own mother get eaten by a Titan – how could anyone ever be alright after witnessing that?

Why hadn't I done something to stop it?

_I should have run after them…_

I wanted nothing more than to just bang my head repeatedly against a wall while chanting curses at myself on end.

I was now responsible for Eren going in total revenge-mode in the future and possibly end up as Sasuke Uchiha. And then sometime in the future, we are all going to realize that the Titans are good and were really forced into being man-eating assholes by the government – and then Eren will want to take down everything within these walls as revenge. My god, what should I do…? I did not want Eren to end up as Sasuke Uchiha.

A soft _thud_ was heard as the boat slowly started to make its way off the shoreline.

You know how people always say stuff like, "witnessing the disaster at first hand is far worse than hearing about it or seeing it on TV"?

Well, those people were right.

I continued to press my palms against my ears in an attempt to block out the horrific sounds around us. People were screaming and begging to get on the boat, or simply for their children to get access. Some were in a desperate attempt not to get left behind, jumping off the shore and trying to climb their way to the moving boats. Several of the civilians _on_ the boat were either in shock or having panic attacks, some begging for God to save us all, while others were simply crying and shaking in fright.

This was by far worse than anything I could have ever prepared myself for.

Then, like an anticipated earthquake that finally decided to show up, every civilian went dead quiet as a deep pounding was felt in the ground, like something heavy moving across the field. Everything stilled, almost as if preparing for a new disaster to come.

Breath caught in the throat, I bolted out of my seat and leaned over the railing of the boat once more. My eyes were wide as I stared at the gate slowly closing, and my heart was beating loudly against my chest. I couldn't see anything beyond the gate, all I could do was listen in apprehension as the sound of heavy footsteps were nearing the gate from the other side.

There was no doubt about _what_ it was, not for me at least.

I wanted to scream – to warn the soldiers and civilians still standing horror-struck by the gate from the on-coming threat. But before my mouth even had a chance of opening, the large brick wall exploded, a blur of rocks and people being flung backwards by the massive Titan. It was huge – looking to be 15 meters high – and was covered in hardened plates that acted as a protective shield.

_The Armored Titan._

A Titan Shifter.

A human in the body of a Titan.

All I could think while slowly sailing away from the terrible scenery was how on earth somebody could do this to the rest of humanity. How could somebody – a human – kill so many innocent people without even batting an eye? How could you live with yourself? Why would somebody _want_ to wipe out what was left of humanity? These people – the Armored Titan and the Colossal Titan – what was their reason for doing this to the rest of us? If they destroyed the walls, where would they even go afterwards?

My mind was one large throbbing swirl of confused questions. I was desperately trying to figure these people out, while at the same time trying not to go crazy like some civilians on the ship surely had. _Why are Titans even here?_

It was all so frustrating and confusing.

How would I even fight these things? _Me?_ I had turned tail and run off before one could even get near me. I was just an ordinary person who on karma's demand ended up here. How could somebody like me ever hope to fight Titans? It seemed so surreal and childish; to think I ever considered the possibility. As if _I_ could fly around, jump from roof to roof, and cut the nape of a Titan's neck. I wasn't cut out for this…

_But what about Armin, Eren and Mikasa?_

What the hell was I even thinking? I was scared, cowering away from everything, but that didn't mean I would just let those three join the damn military without me. I needed to look out for them – I was the one with knowledge of the freaking future. Thinking it over, I could save so many people with the things I knew.

Besides, if I didn't join the military, what would I even do? Live the next five years inside Wall Rose and just… wait. _Wait_ for it to be taken down like Wall Maria just was? There was one thing I was sure of, and it was that I hated waiting. I was not a very patient person, and surely five long years of waiting inside Wall Rose would drive me insane…

_The military it is._

"What's the matter, Eren?" I heard Armin ask concerned, snapping me out of my thoughts and back to reality. Looking up, I realized we had made it a reasonable distance away from the Shiganshina District. _I zone out too much_, my mind scolded, as I slowly got up from the floor on the boat. Ever so carefully, I made my way over to Armin's side, watching with unease as Eren shoved the blonde boy's hand off his shoulder.

_He won't jump over the railing and swim back to Shiganshina, will he?_ It certainly did seem like an option with the way Eren was staggering toward the side of the boat. It was worrying, and as a result, I took a step forward and past Armin, getting ready to pull Eren back to the boat in case he jumped off. I wanted to say something – anything – but the fresh tears streaming down Eren's cheeks made me wisely shut up.

"I'm going to kill them all." Eren declared, his voice loud, harsh, and full of hatred. It made me flinch back in shock just from hearing it. "Not even a single one of them will be left…!"

I swallowed hard, my eyes dilating from pure shock. His eyes – Eren's mesmerizing teal blue eyes – were suddenly so wide and filled with revengeful hatred. He was glaring with such bitter detest for the Titans, I'm sure if one had spotted him, it would have dropped dead a thousand times over.

I knew then the child I had grown up with – the Eren Jaeger I knew – was long gone. That childish innocence his eyes used to hold was no longer there. Eren's days of focusing his destructive rage at the Titans had started now.

**That year, the Central Government decided to withdraw all human activity inside Wall Rose. **

**The Titans devoured 10,000 people.**

* * *

><p>The next morning I was awakened by something… odd. A sound, actually. A sound that belonged to the voice of a person I knew fairly well at this point.<p>

A whimpering.

I scrunched my nose up in a mix of confusion and irritation. Blinking my eyes open and adjusting my sight to the sudden light room, I rolled over and came face to face with a not-so-peacefully-asleep Eren. His eyes were squeezed tightly shut and his lips were pulled back in a groan of discomfort, his body twisting and turning.

Eyes going wide, I bolted up from the floor, nearly colliding my head with Mikasa's forehead who was sitting by Eren's feet. Slightly disoriented, I blinked at her, before adjusting my vision to the sobbing Eren on the floor.

"Mikasa, what's wrong with him? Is he alright?" I shifted my position so that I was sitting by Eren's side.

"He is having a nightmare." The girl by my side answered, her dark eyes expressing worry.

The bells went off just as I had reached my hand out to wake Eren up, ringing their usual loud tune and waking anyone up who might still be asleep. With a gasp, Eren shot his eyes open and were awake.

I jumped in surprise and quickly retracted my hand, mentally throwing all sorts of curses at the boy for startling me.

"Eren, are you okay?" Mikasa asked softly, shuffling closer to the frightened boy. "You were crying in your sleep."

Eren slowly sat up, seeming to be mentally far away from here.

"It felt like I just met dad."

"No, it was just a dream." Mikasa explained.

I remained silent, thinking it over. If my memories weren't failing me, I believed Eren had just dreamt about his father. In the anime, it had shown short, alarming and disturbing clips of how Eren's father had shot him full of some sort of liquid. I had more than once speculated if that liquid is what made Eren into a Titan Shifter – it was a pretty obvious lead. Did that mean Eren was a Titan Shifter now? But for how long had he been that way? When had he been injected? I couldn't remember ever meeting Eren's father – not even once.

"Let's go." Mikasa said, snapping me out of my thoughts and ripping me back to reality. "They are handing out rations today."

Slightly dazed, I got up from the floor and followed Mikasa and Eren out from the old barn we were sleeping in. My eyes were flickering back and forth, I came to the conclusion that none from my family was here anymore.

"This place used to be the food reserves." Mikasa explained as the three of us entered a large courtyard. Despite its remarkable size, it was still filled up with crowds of people. I immediately knew that finding just one of my family members would be a difficult task with this many people around. "The people who came by ships have now gathered here."

There were numerous lines of civilians huddled up, all waiting patiently – and some less patiently – to reach one of the soldiers who were handing out food. I fiddled nervously with the tips of my hair at the sight of two men struggling and throwing punches at one another over a single piece of bread. People were watching the two fight, some with wide eyes and some less intrigued, but no one made a move that might indicate they would try and stop the two men.

I vaguely heard Mikasa saying something about fighting for our survival, before a familiar cheery voice cut through the crowd of people. Snapping my head to the side, I found to my relief that Armin was running toward the three of us.

"Tara! Eren! Mikasa!" Armin stopped in front of us; his arms occupied carrying four loafs of bread rolls. I smiled, inwardly doing a victory-dance at the thought of looking for one less family member today. "Look! I made it!" _If you were about to leak your pants, Armin, I would rather not hear about it._ "Grandpa got these for us kids!"

Armin handed the bread rolls out evenly between the four of us. Smiling, I accepted the food and was quick to take a large bite from it. I had only chewed once however, as I realized the soldier standing behind Armin was throwing us all a contempt glare. My eyes narrowed into slits on instinct as I glared back, but the soldier simply turned and walked off with a huff.

"What's the matter with him?" Eren asked sourly, also seeming to be glaring after him. I suppressed the urge to yell the few cusses I still remembered in English after the soldier, by chewing on the bread in my mouth.

"That's how it goes." Armin explained, turning back to us. "There's probably not enough food for everyone. This is an entire day's worth. There are just too many refugees. There's always been a food shortage, and you know how people always look down on those who live in the outskirts."

My eyes widened at Armin's words and flickered to the food in my hand. This little piece of bread was an entire day's worth? For the love of Bilbo Baggins I had already devoured half of it!

"Why do we have to give our food to the outsiders?" I heard someone ask, and as I turned to find the culprit, I realized it was the same soldier who had given us looks of disapproval. My eyes instantly turned hard as the soldier continued to bicker with his friend. "I mean, the Titans broke through the wall anyway. They should've eaten more of them."

I froze.

It felt like someone just poured ice-cold water down my back.

_What did he just say…?_ My eyes were wide with disbelief. He could not have been serious – did he even realize what he just said? How could someone say something like that? How could he wish for more of us to just go ahead and die after something like that? We had barely made it out alive, and yet here he was, wishing that more of us hadn't made it.

My stomach was turning with several emotions; shock, disbelief, rejection, humiliation, loathing, hurt, frustration, rage…

"Eren!" Armin called in alarm. My eyes flickered to the brunette boy who was slowly, but determined, making his way toward the two soldiers. His fists where clenched together, and his shoulders were tense. _Crap…_

"This will just make the food shortage worse." The soldier went on, oblivious to Eren's approach.

I made a move to run after Eren and stop him before he did something he would later regret, but by the time I had taken one step in his direction, the boy had already kicked the soldier across the shin. I cringed at the harsh impact, my stomach turning with worry. I wanted nothing more than to just beat this soldier up too, but reality was a bitch. We were just children, it's not like we could do much.

"What the hell are you doing, you brat?!" The soldier roared, raising his fist and hitting Eren across the jaw. His friend joined in on the beating and kicked Eren to the ground, making my breath hitch. This was _not_ okay. Two soldiers, _grown men_, were beating up a child!

"You don't know what you're talking about!" Eren shouted back at them, his eyes tearing up. "You've never seen it happen with your own eyes! How the Titans eat people…!"

"Shut up!" The first soldier yelled, both men getting ready to throw another punch. I moved forward at the realization, my mind urging me to just do something. I didn't care that they were grown men _and_ soldiers, I couldn't just stand by and watch as Eren got beat up. Worst-case scenario, I guess I could always scream 'rapists' or something, if they dared beat _another_ child up.

Just as I had gotten ready to defend Eren by tacking (if possible) the first soldier, Armin ran out in front of me with raised arms on either side.

"We're sorry!" He shouted, his voice apologetic and humble. I glowered at the two soldiers. If they dared throw one punch at Armin, I would make _the _biggest scene yet known to man and have them thrown in jail for child-molesting… after I beat them up… you know, somehow. "He's just ticked off because he's hungry. That's why he's acting like a brat. We're really sorry!"

A large crowd had gathered by now, and by the look of their expressions, it seemed like the two soldiers was starting to feel uncomfortable. Throwing one last glare their way, I turned around and squatted down in front of Eren, noticing that Mikasa had made it to his side by now.

"Whatever…" One of the soldiers said, and I heard him slowly stagger off. "You would've been dead without us. You kids should learn to be more grateful."

"Yes!" Armin shouted, making me grit my teeth together in frustration. _Don't go making a scene now that they are gone…_

"Dammit…" Eren swore, glaring daggers at the ground beneath us, "I'd rather die than leech off people like him…"

I didn't say anything, because I knew where he was coming from. Instead, I curled my fingers around Eren's wrist and dragged him up from the ground, silently asking the three to follow. We were sitting in the middle of the courtyard, and there were too many people around to just suddenly throw a tantrum. We didn't need any more trouble.

* * *

><p>I ended up eating the whole damn bread anyway.<p>

My stomach still felt empty, though. I wasn't sure I would survive the next year if this is all we got to eat everyday. Damn how I missed my ridiculously large hamburgers and peanut butter sandwiches. Not to mention my cereal. And soda. Especially Coca Cola. Come to think of it, I think I sill have a stack of hidden sodas under my bed – you know, way back at the orphanage. I had had to hide them from that greedy pig, Billy. Damn I hated that kid. Always thought he could eat my food and steal my drinks…

Urgh, just thinking about it made my mouth water like some dog.

"I'll be back inside Wall Maria and kill off all the Titans." Eren suddenly declared, making me look up from my lab. I sat seated beside him inside a hollow window on a small wall, and I could practically feel the anger radiating off him.

"Eren, you're not serious, right?" Armin asked carefully, his smile strained.

"I've never been more serious!" Eren shouted, jumping off the wall and getting right up in Armin's face. I felt my body stiffen at the sudden motion. Eren had been on edge a lot lately, and I knew it didn't take much for his temper to get the better of him.

"I'm not like those people who only act tough when protected by the wall!" Eren took one glance at the uneaten bread in his hand, before furiously throwing it at Armin, who caught it awkwardly. "I don't need this crap!"

_If Eren isn't planning on eating the bread, I wonder if I can have it?_ I vaguely noticed Mikasa's dark eyes narrow into slits from the action. Jumping off the wall, I took an uneasy step in Eren's direction, not really sure of what to do or how to calm him down.

"Eren, what are you doing?!" Armin asked in a less aggravated shout.

"Just calm down, Eren." I said, trying to reason with the boy. My voice was stern, but underneath it was unease, as I didn't want to see this escalate. In an attempt to calm him, I gently placed my hand on Eren's shoulder, but he simply shoved it off (rather harsh, I might add).

"Doesn't it piss you off?!" Eren went on in a loud voice. He was getting too worked up over this. "We can't do anything against the Titans because we live off of such pity!"

"It's impossible!" Armin countered, making me grimace. This argument was not heading in a very cheerful direction. "Nothing can defeat them. Our only choice is to live inside the walls. If you do anything rash, you'll die the same way the others did!"

"So that's why you're sucking up to those people?! Do you have no shame?!"

"That's all we can do right now!"

"That's just an excuse! Just continue living like livestock, you weak piece of shit!"

That was it.

_Nobody_ talked to Armin that way.

I was about ready to tackle Eren, to hit him and kick him and bite him until he apologized. Before I could do anything however, Mikasa had swung her fist and Eren was thrown across the ground.

Silence.

"Mikasa…?"

"If Armin is weak, then so are you and I and Tara. We couldn't even escape the Titans or leave the city by ourselves. Even the food is from someone else. There is absolutely no chance of us weaklings taking down even one Titan." Mikasa explained, her voice stern but patient. It was harsh, but it was the truth. Eren was still sitting on the ground, his jaw tight and his teeth clenched together. "What's important is staying alive, just as your mother said."

Mikasa started to make her way toward Eren, and as she passed by Armin, she snatched the bread from his hand that Eren had thrown earlier. Standing in front of him, she forcefully shoved the bread into Eren's mouth.

"Eat." Mikasa ordered, motioning for Eren to eat the bread. I released a breath I didn't know I was holding, and moved over to give Armin's hand a gentle comforting squeeze. "Eat and stay alive. I won't let you starve to death."

At the end of her sentence, it almost sounded as if she was begging Eren. The brown-haired boy made a few choking sounds, but otherwise complied, silent tears streaming down his cheeks.

I didn't want the bread now that Eren had gotten his slobber all over it.

* * *

><p>A few days later, the refugees were all sent to cultivate land and secure food. But that couldn't prevent the food shortage.<p>

In the following year of 846, the Central Government launched a campaign to retake Wall Maria using the refugees.

Knowing that 250 thousand of them were sent off – almost a fifth of the total population – but only about a hundred would survive, was my breaking point. They were sent off too – my and Armin's family.

Ada, who had found me that day and taken me in without a second thought, taken me in as her daughter – she was going. Michael, the husband of Ada who had always laughed warmly at my odd behavior and ruffled my hair when I had done something that was not allowed, he who had acted as the father that didn't want to scold his children – he was going. Grandfather, the old man who had let me braid his beard, and would always give me wise advice on how to handle Armin's bullies – he was going, too. They were all sent off, and Armin and I would be left behind.

Going through the fall of Shiganshina was hard, but witnessing the family that had loved and cared for you the past four years was harder. The tight ball of pain that had gathered in my chest had been squeezing and strangling me. A terrible weight had laid on my shoulders as they said goodbye. It felt as if a large boulder just laid there and prevented me from straightening up or catching my breathing properly.

As a result, all I had done was cling onto Ada as she had embraced me in a tight hug. Once the first tear had escaped, there seemed to be no end. I had cried, sobbed, whimpered, moaned, and I had begged them not to go. Over and over again had I begged them to stay.

While clinging onto her, like a koala cub did to its mother, Ada had pulled some sort of necklace off and over her head.

"It's carved out of a black agate stone." She had explained, as I had watched the necklace with blurry eyes.

It was an oval cameo pendant, looking to have been hand-carved in three-dimensional relief, and portrayed a woman's face seen from the side. One of her hands was shown, and in it, she was holding a human skull, cradling it against her cheek. The lower background was a dark onyx color, while the upper surface was a soft creamy white. The pendant was framed by oxidized silver and was hanging from an old thin chain.

"The necklace signalizes the line between life and death. The initiation was for it to symbolize the possibility of rebirth." Ada had told me, while carefully bringing the old chain over my head. _Oh, the irony,_ I had thought dryly, watching as the pendant rested perfectly below my collarbone. "It's a family heir. It has been passed down from the women in our family for generations. And now, I'm passing it on to you, Tara."

As our family moved out to secure the rest of us food, Armin and I had stood hand-in-hand on the sidelines. Never in my life had I felt so helpless before. All of a sudden, Eren's words dawned upon me, and I understood what he meant.

When the 100-or-so refugees had returned a few days later, my thoughts were confirmed.

My and Armin's family had not made it.

It was declared that with their sacrifice, the food shortage had improved, albeit a little, for those who survived. At that moment, a burning part of me grew a hatred for the Central Government and what the people in it had done to my family. They had sent my family off to a certain death. _They_ were the reason my family wasn't coming back.

It was all their fault.

"The Titans are to blame." Eren stated, his voice stern yet soft at the same time. Mentally, I disagreed with him, but decided not to say it aloud to avoid getting in a fight with him.

I sat huddled up against Armin, who was clutching the hat grandfather had given him, silent tears streaming down his cheeks. I wasn't able to cry; it felt like I had used up enough tears for the next decade when our family said their goodbyes. Watching Armin cry and hold onto a simple hat as if his life depended on it, however, gave me a whole new meaning to "a broken heart".

Because it felt as if _my_ heart was breaking in half at the sight. Watching Armin like this was tearing me up from the inside out. The worst thing of it all was that I couldn't do anything about it. All I could do was sit with him, hold him, and hope that someday he would be okay. But I still felt downright miserable watching Armin in his broken state. I felt _helpless_.

"If only we could defeat them," Eren said quietly, "we would regain our place in this world." Ever so carefully, Eren slid down the wall behind us and seated himself on Armin's other side. My eyes flickered to meet Eren's, and as we made eye contact, I realized just how much determination was in them.

"Tara, Armin, I'm applying for military training next year." I could hear Mikasa sigh from Eren's words, while Armin's head perked up from under grandfather's hat. "I'll become strong enough to fight them."

I tore my gaze from Eren and went back to silently stare at the ground. _Guess it's happening._ They were all three stating that they would apply for the military. I let my eyelids fall shut, as a million of thoughts started to propel through my mind.

During this past year, I had realized just how much I hated feeling weak. I hated not being able to do anything, and I hated simply to stand by while the people around me were killed one after the other. It was the feeling of helplessness I resented. The feeling that bubbled up when you knew nothing you did would help or change anything.

"Me too." I heard Armin murmur softly beside me.

"Armin?" Eren gasped.

"Me too!" Armin repeated, louder and with much more confidence and determination in his voice. I couldn't help the small smile that tugged at the corners of my lips. Armin was often underestimated simply because he was more timid and weaker than the rest of us. But underneath all of that, there lurked determination. Armin was so much stronger than people gave him credit for.

I was proud of him.

"I'm applying too." I spoke up, squeezing Armin's hand. I turned my head to the two of them and threw them a silly grin. "Can't have you two wandering off without supervision, right?"

Armin returned my smile and squeezed my hand back, while Eren simply shot me a rather pleased look. _If you guys are going, then so am I._ Part of me wanted to join the military so that I could grow stronger and feel less helpless, while another part of me was scared to the bone that these three would leave me behind.

It was… weird, really. I used to be a bit of a lone wolf in my previous life. And now, I came to realize just how dependent I am on these three. I didn't _want_ them to leave me and join the military by themselves. I wanted to join too, to be with them, to mature and grow stronger alongside them.

"I'll join you too." Mikasa said, making Eren divert his eyes to the girl standing in front of us.

"Mikasa? You don't have to! You said survival is the most important thing."

"Yes," Mikasa agreed, her face never wavering with doubt for even a second, "and I will be there ensuring your safety."

I smiled, content and relieved with the outcome. My eyes flickered back to Eren who was hauling himself up from the ground.

"All right, the four of us will all join."

My smile turned into a grin that could match that of the Cheshire Cat. What was that quote he had once said?

"_Every adventure requires a first step. Trite, but true, even here."_

One gotta love that genius cat – he was _almost_ as wise as grandfather.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: This chapter ended up taking far longer to write than I had expected. I was a little uncertain about what to do with Armin and Tara's family, as it in the anime was mentioned that they died during the fall of Shiganshina, but in the manga it said they died in the recovery mission. I ended up going with the recovery mission, as that seems to have an interesting effect on Tara. **

**In case you guys are wondering, Tara has _not_ read the manga. I decided to go with this because, 1. like mentioned in a previous chapter, Tara is a lazy ass and doesn't like to read, and 2. I know that a lot of people haven't read the manga and are waiting for season 2 to come out, so I didn't want to risk spoiling anything for those of you who haven't read it.**

**For those of you wondering (or confused) as to how Tara's necklace looks like, simply look up "cameo pendant" on Google.**

**Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**


	7. A Bitter Year

**A/N: A bit of a short chapter this time.**

* * *

><p><em>[Friends are the family we choose for ourselves.]<em>

* * *

><p>Close to five months had passed by since the death of my and Armin's family. It had turned winter by then, and the cold weather was almost unbearable. The chilly air was brisk and biting, hurling tiny pellets of pain against my stinging cheeks and nose. The hood I had pulled over my head of the thick cloak we had all been given wasn't doing much against the harsh whiplashes of wind on my face. I sniffed and ran a hand over my running nose.<p>

Looking up, I realized small petals of snowflakes had started to fall from the gray sky. I shivered as one of the snowflakes landed on my skin and melted against my forehead, quick to duck my head again.

The snow played with my memories and made me think back a few years to when Armin, Eren, Mikasa and I had had an all-out snowball war. It was one of the first days when the snow fell that I had suggested the idea and brought it into action by throwing a ball of snow at Eren's face, making him fall backwards.

It didn't take long before Mikasa had us all beaten.

I remember vaguely walking home with a large bruise on my arm.

And now, at the age of 12 (physically), instead of running around and playing with snow, I was working in the middle of a large field, trying to make it cultivable.

It sucked.

I had to keep reminding myself that this land later would save all of us from starving.

I continued to silently pull the old hoe across the ground that had long ago turned hard and icy. My eyes flickered up from the ground as three soldiers came walking by.

"Hey, this land here should have been made cultivable before winter, am I right?" The soldier in the front said, looking at a notebook in his hand. They were all three from the Military Police.

I clenched my jaw and continued to work.

"B-but most of our workers were kicked out and sent on that recovery mission five months ago." The younger soldier in the middle answered nervously.

"Of that I am quite aware. But you should have thought of something. Maintaining production output up to the scheduled amounts is supposed to be your damn job." The first soldier said harshly, making the younger soldier wince.

"My… my apologies, Sir."

"We're gonna be the ones who end up starving at this rate." The soldier in the front commented sourly as he passed by us all. I glared after him, muttering one incompetent thing after the other.

"The military police." The older man a little ways from me snorted. He and his wife had been given the same job as Armin, Eren, Mikasa and I, which was to get this very field ready for farming. "So full of themselves."

"Quit rambling, you senile old fool." The old man's wife snapped softly, glancing in our direction. "Don't give the kids any funny ideas…"

"Hey, kids," The man went on, ignoring his wife for the moment. I looked up from the ground, "you'll soon be old enough for the trainees' squad, right?" Eren and I nodded quietly. "If you're gonna be soldiers, be sure not to become like those guys."

I sniffed some snot up through my nostrils again and went back to work. The more time I spend here, the more I realized just how much of an ass every soldier in the Military Police was. They were all absolute scum; pushing civilians around and making us all do their bidding, while complaining at the same time. They were supposed to be the best of the best, but when I looked at them, all I saw was a lost nasty piece of work. I _hated _the Military Police and everything it stood for.

"What's wrong, Armin?" I suddenly heard Eren ask from my left side. I looked up from my plowing and found that Armin had stopped working. He was staring after the three soldiers, his fingers clenched around the hoe in his hand. His eyes were full of anger, frustration and hurt.

"Armin…?" I questioned quietly, worry taking over. I had never in my life seen him like this.

"Recovery mission, my foot…" Armin choked out, his fist squeezing tighter and turning white. "They killed off my and Tara's family to have less mouths to feed." I swallowed hard. "Yet look at them. Look at them now…"

I reached my hand out and gently took a hold of Armin's free hand. The boy's eyes flickered from the soldiers to me.

"It will be okay." I said softly, giving Armin's hand a squeeze. I wasn't sure he could feel it, as his hand surely must have been as cold and numb as mine. "Everything will be all right. I promise."

I couldn't even begin to count how many times I had recited those exact words. Whenever Armin would cry or seem to just lose all hope, it was those exact words I would start to chant over and over again. I was waiting for the day where they wouldn't have any effect on Armin anymore, but the day had yet to come. For some reason, those words always seemed to calm Armin. They were partially true, too.

Even if only for a little while, things would get better in the future.

* * *

><p>The next morning I sat on top of one of the many brick walls, quietly watching the sunrise in the horizon.<p>

Yes, for once in my life I was up early.

Shocker!

I _had_ wondered if an alien had visited and taken over my body while I was asleep.

Or maybe some foreign lost soul from another dimensional future?

You know, just like I had done to this poor kid.

The possibilities seemed endless…

As mentioned, it was very unusual for me to wake up this early in the morning, but for some reason, I found that I simply couldn't sleep. I wasn't really sure why, because I certainly needed the sleep. I guess it was just one of those days where your brain decided to go total scumbag on you.

My legs were dangling over the edge, gracefully swinging from one side to the other to keep the blood running. Me being the idiot I surely was, I had decided to exit our temporarily house and greet the cold morning weather in a simple sweater and long skirt.

The puckering had stopped and now I simply couldn't feel my butt anymore.

"You'll get sick siting out here without much clothes on."

I diverted my eyes from the rising sun and to the person standing behind the short wall. Mikasa's eyes turned into mild disapproval at my attire. I gave her a small smile in response, running my sleeve across my red nose.

"I'm already sick."

Wordlessly, Mikasa began to heave herself up on the wall, sitting down beside me and throwing her legs off the edge. She pulled off the thick blanket on her shoulders and gently repositioned it, pulling both of us inside the large piece of wool. I breathed out at the warm sensation engulfing my small frame. Snaking my arm under Mikasa's, I snuggled closer to the warm girl and softly put my head on her shoulder. Mikasa neither flinched nor said anything.

We continued to watch the sunrise in silence. The large glowing sphere was slowly rising into the dull morning sky. The sun casted sunbeams in every direction, illuminating the still sleeping town. The sky had turned a soft pink color; it made the clouds look like big balls of cotton candy.

Or just a large herd of Kirbies.

"How are you doing?" Mikasa asked after a while in silence, her eyes still resting on the sun peeking over the Wall. I felt my lips tug upwards and into a smile.

The first time I had asked Mikasa _'how are you doing?'_ she had looked rather confused. She had questioned why I asked her such a thing when we practically saw each other every day. I explained that even if we saw each other almost every day, it didn't mean none of us ever had any problems in life.

After that, _'how are you doing?'_ became a thing Mikasa and I had together. It was something we would ask each other every once in a while if we wanted to check up on the other. When asking how the other was doing, you were practically asking in to the person's life. Were there any issues one needed advice with? Maybe one had been the victim for some weird experience that was in need of getting spilled out. _'How are you doing?'_ basically involved anything in life.

"'How am I doing'?" I repeated, thinking the question over. "I'm doing alright, actually. Considering everything that has happened lately, I feel relatively fine. It was kind of hard at first, especially because Armin was really down and would constantly cry and I didn't really know how to make him feel better. And even though I can tell he is still not completely himself, it's getting better. But man, has it gotten cold lately. You know, the other day I had to go to the bathroom because I had to pee really bad, and you know what happened? My pee almost froze. It was really weird. And then the other day I woke up and realized I had been drooling in my sleep, and the drool had actually frozen solid onto my cheek. It really hurt to peel it off, you know. Uh! Also –"

Mikasa continued to patiently listen to me ramble on. She never said a word, but simply listened as I babbled about everything, from my worry for Armin, to the time where a squirrel had snatched the acorns I had been collecting for a late time snack.

It was times like these I realized just how close I had gotten to Mikasa over the years. I used to find it slightly unnerving how she rarely spoke and never made any revealing expressions. But over the years I had grown accustomed to it.

Now, I could read Mikasa's deadpanned expressions, most of the time at least. And I loved the silent hours we had together. It was peaceful and it gave me a chance to think in the presence of another person.

"We have to stick together." I blurted out, changing the subject. Mikasa's eyes flickered from the sunrise to me, silently asking me what I had meant. I beamed up at her and snuggled my face further into her soft dark hair.

"The four of us." I explained, grinning silly up at the girl. "We only have each other now, so we have to watch out for each other." My eyes fell shut as I pulled in a soft breath. The lack of sleep seemed to have caught up to me now, my mind going fuzzy from the lack of stamina. I yawned and the next thing I said ended up becoming a little slurry. "Even if none of us are related by blood, I still see you guys as my family now."

We were sort of like a family – a bit of a weird one at that. We had the overprotective and ridiculously strong sister with a brother-complex, the Titan Shifter brother that needed a skip to the anger management classes and had a revenge problem, the timid and weak boy who was in truth a genius and way smarter than the average adult, and the 21st century weirdo who somehow managed to get stuck here and continuously creeped the rest of the family out with her strange language and foreign words.

Just what had the world come to? Before we know of it, flying pigs and pink unicorns have defeated the Titans.

That sure would solve a few things.

My body had gone numb from exhaustion. I was already on the way into a deep sleep. The next thing Mikasa murmured I barely seemed to grasp, and I wasn't sure it was my mind playing tricks with me or not.

"That's why I'll always protect you."

Real or not, it still made me smile before dozing off.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Short, chapter is short. I apologize deeply. I just sort of felt the need to properly end this ark and write a last chapter where Tara and the others are still kids. Not to mention, that scene with Tara and Mikasa has been stuck in my head for a while and I _really_ wanted to write it.**


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